Da Page

New Victim of the Economic Crisis

2009-04-09T19:17:00.003+08:00

Recieved news of a pay cut today. (About 10%)
Reason: Company is not doing well.
Will be coerced into signing a contract next Monday.
Kinda looking forward to see if they can possibily pull any more crazy stunts on us.
Absolutely disgusted with this place.
Working as hard as or even harder than every other engineer with 1.5 yr experience
Earning absolutely peanuts even when compared to a fresh grad working in Singapore
Treated with almost absolutely no respect as an individual by the more "superior" race

Only saving grace: Very interesting job scope

Is it worth it anymore?

I don't know.

Moo.
Lost.
Exhausted. Both physically and mentally

For You

2009-02-22T00:43:00.006+08:00

I met someone recently.

He is as ordinary a guy as you can ever meet.
You will probably not even take notice if he passed by you on the street.
But today he showed me something really interesting.
Before I share what he showed me, I shall describe him to you.
____________________________________________________________
He loves music in general.
He enjoys being around music, all the time.
He owns many original cds.
Far more than he can afford or rather far more than what you THINK he SHOULD be spending on them.
He is willing to save on cab fare and basic necessities, but splurges on music, food, apparel and tech toys.
He enjoys singing, regardless of whether he sounds good or not.
He deeply wishes he had a musical talent.

He hates his current company and work.
He hates it for the politics, the concept of a superior race and the extremely ridiculous business decisions that the incompetent managers make everyday.
He has made up his mind on clocking the hours and leaving when something comes by.
He smiles and says some things that he knows he has to, to get certain things done
And sometimes he hates that he does that, because many times that is so not true.
____________________________________________________________

Well, that’s it.
He showed me, “me”.
He showed me who I have become and who I was.
He made me think very hard about my current life.
Does listening to advice = doing what is advised?
Does doing what is advised = learning = adapting = growing up?
Does growing up = losing yourself = losing what you are = losing what you really want?

How many times have you heard in your life
“Huh? You are still doing XXX? You should be doing YYY”
“So ridiculous / so expensive / so nonsensical, stop doing XXX!”
“You should XXX, YYY. Its good for you.”
How many times have you compromised to fit in?
How many times have you given in to demands that you really don’t wish to?

For me.
Too many.

I have drifted so far from what I planned, what I wished for, what I think I want and what I think I need that I don’t even realise it anymore.
I keep giving in to demands to change, to grow up, to keep up, to whatever that I don’t know who I am anymore.

One has to live up to his choices.

Wishing I can be me sometimes.
Where I can be truly selfish and think only about me.
Where I still actually know who I am and what I want.

It actually feels so laughable that I need someone to show me/ remind me who I used to be.

I start singing
Yeah I was singing
This song
For you

Music : Celine Dion – Song for you

Big Business & Pantry Woes

2009-02-17T22:34:00.000+08:00

Costs savings. The single most powerful and probably most important phrase in the corporate world. I guess, it is even more important these days with such “excellent” global economic outlook.

On businessdictionary.com, it is defined as Decision or action that will result in fulfillment of the objectives of a purchase, at a cost lower than the historical cost or the projected cost.

In practice, every company may have their own internal strategies, be it cutting raw material costs, saving electricity, reducing unnecessary headcount, minimizing asset depreciation effects etc etc.

For mine, the coolest to date has to do with toilet paper. Basically some asshole somewhere along the line came up with the brilliant suggestion of cutting expenditure by providing toilet paper on a quota basis. Basically, every employee has to approach the HR to collect their monthly allocation of ONE bloody roll of toilet paper. Even more shockingly, this allocation has been suspended recently, with the HR acting blur. Once again, failing to perform the already minimal activities they are tasked to do by the “boss”.

So, I guess, our strategy is as such. To make it big in this business, one needs to allocate the time and resources allowable for all employees’ “big businesses”.

Not too long ago, there was even a form where every local Chinese employee has to fill in, stating the number of effective hours they spend working a day and the amount of time they spend on private activities. In the private activities column, in brackets, this was stated (Estimate of private time, including time for filling up and drinking water at the pantry and going to the toilet etc.)

Pantry! According to my dearest friend in the accountancy business it is one of the criteria for picking any firm among the Top 5 in Singapore. If this is true, I guess, perhaps no one in the right mind would ever join my company.

Our pantry includes, pitifully, only 1 water cooler that services more than 200 employees, that provide hot water (that is seldom hot maybe around 50 degrees), lukewarm water (that is usually scalding) and cold water (that is seldom cold, usually around 30 degrees). Every morning when every one comes to work there is a long queue waiting to fill up their tiny bottles. Perhaps this is the latest company strategy in cutting costs and improving interaction between colleagues. OH! Did I forget to mention that there are NO seats or vending machines or sinks? Just a pail for every body to dispose of their tea leaves and a tiny waste paper basket for disposal of empty coffee sachets.

Yet another, humbling lesson on how to make it big in the business.

According to my pseudo superior, you are new in the company and should pick up any lessons available from the seniors and be grateful to the company that you have a job.

Perhaps I really need to learn. Yeah?

Moo.
Music – None (Blogging in the office before a meeting)
Mood - Shitty

Flying Cow

2009-02-04T20:30:00.000+08:00

Doing / will be doing a lot of flying around lately.

First, Shenzhen to Singapore for a short break of about 14 days for Chinese New Year.
Then, Singapore to Shenzhen for 2 days to check emails and pick up materials.
Then, Shenzhen to Beijing for 3 days at customer factory to perform builds for a new mobile phone.
Then, Beijing to Shenzhen till early March to resume normal daily work, where I get to stay flightless of about 20 days.
Lastly, Shenzhen to Singapore for a wedding and back to Shenzhen.

All these flights for January to March, 2009.
Trust me when I do say I am sick of flying.

Been leading a topsy turvy life for the past 1.5 years or so.
However, this makes you appreciate the simplest things in life a lot more.
1 example below. =)

During my Chinese New Year holidays in Singapore, I woke up at around 7 am everyday to have breakfast with my parents before they leave for work. Simple, dry, Fishball Mee Pok. Rushed home, packed my bag and went for a swim at a nearby swimming complex. Naturally, the pool was deserted as most other people are at work or at school. The peace and calm from swimming and lazing around the deserted pool was PURE JOY. I have never felt so relaxed in a ultra long time. After the leisurely swim I went home, made some tea and sat at my balcony and just stared blankly at the little kids moving around at Punggol Primary school just in front of my flat. The feeling was amazing lah. Zoning out with a cup of tea, enjoying the gentle sunshine and cooling breeze in the morning. Ooh lala! =)

To all my friends, do try that sometimes! Taking a short break and doing absolutely nothing, thinking about absolutely nothing at all! You will be amazed at how good it feels.

On a side note, I reallllly wanna try out going for a good spa trip. Perhaps that will be an even better feeling after all. =)

Music – None (Supposedly still working at customer’s factory)
Mood – Frozen balls in Beijing. =P (negative 2 to negative 6 degrees)

11 minutes on Sunday

2008-12-14T16:04:00.001+08:00

Was reading 11 minutes by Paulo Coelho and I quote.

A vicar in a protestant church said something like that in one of his sermons.

“In all the languages in the world, there is the same proverb: “What the eyes don’t see, the heart doesn’t grieve over.” Well, I say there isn’t an ounce of truth in it.

The further off they are, the closer to the heart are all those feelings that we try to repress and forget. If we’re in exile, we want to store away every tiny memory of our roots. If we’re far away from the person we love, everyone we pass in the streets reminds us of them.

Maybe the only time when you are truly able to work overseas is when you have everyone who means anything to you here with you.

Then, why work overseas?

Is this a sign or have I not tried hard enough?

Wandering mind on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

Music: Enya – My! My! Time Flies (All I listen to these days)

Whatever

2008-11-26T14:49:00.004+08:00

Today, I reached a new level of understanding of the company, which is ever so aptly associated with scheming, conniving, irritating foxes. Empty promises, false hopes, pseudo plans. Even only after spending such a short time in the company I can proudly say, “Been there done that. Seen this heard that” Nothing seems surprising anymore. I have even stopped reacting to all the ridiculous changes or so called “developments”, that micraculously pop up on a daily basis. Shall strive to smile in the face of adversity and bitch less about the less than desirable working condition in this less than desirable economic situation.

Boss 1, Day 1
“You will take over the project once XXX leaves, learn fast in 1 month”
Boss 1, Day 2
"I will give YYY the project. You can wait for the next.”

HR1, Day 1
“You get to go home every 90 days”
HR1, Boss 2, Day 100??
Too bad! You had a Hungary assignment. Company policy says you lose 1 home trip. ”

The examples can go on forever, so i shall spare whoever's reading the chore of running through the arduous list.

Define MNC?

Who knows anymore.

Motto for work: Whatever.
Music: 王若琳 – I Love You
Mood: Whatever.

Talking To Myself

2008-06-15T14:40:00.002+08:00

MIA again.
I apologise yet again.
Wonder how many times will this happen before I finally decide to stop blogging forever?
Enough crap, now on to more serious crap.
Here’s a list of top questions and sentences I get on my msn these days.

1) So. How are you?
I’m not too great. Barely surviving on most day, with sudden bursts of happiness whenever I go to Hong Kong for a crazy shopping spree, which is also otherwise known as “retail therapy”.

2) Why are you not happy?
Work sucks. I am constantly shelved because some other “more capable” person with a different nationality will almost always get everything. What I feed on are scraps left over at the dinner table. This happens very, very, very, very often, with a very rare exception of my impending Hungary assignment.

3) WOW! That is a good opportunity! Why aren’t you happy?
YES! Hungary will be a good experience for me. But, that is IF I get a decent work load there! Else I will be sitting around, growing fat again. What kind of good opportunity is that other than meeting people from different nationalities? I want to contribute to the company AND earn my bloody pay for once. So, “let the horses come!” Please!

4) If it sucks so bad why are you staying?
Hoping Hungary will be good and busy.

The above kinda makes up 4 out of 5 of my conversations I have with anybody these days. How pathetic have I become? Always whiny and complaining. Bah! BUT, don’t you guys and ladies worry. Am not suicidal or depressed or anything of that sort. Just grumbling. Think of it this way. How often do you get paid to sit around and grow fat? =)

I shall strive to work harder everyday. Even if it takes begging for work. Literally. Not at a stage of giving up yet. SO you won’t get to see me back in Singapore anytime soon.

Wahahahahahahahahaha!

Hysterical Moo.
Obsessed with Lang Lang and his crazily fast fingers on the piano.
Check out 郎郎 - 黄河之子 (Lang Lang – Dragon Songs). Its quite good. =)

Till next rant!

Cheers my friends!

Watermelon at my Hongkonger housemate's Hongkong house. =) Very Pretty Place!

ROAR!

2008-03-30T14:40:00.000+08:00

Freaking SHIT.
Its about time ya?!
Damn the freaking network here.
My blog and channelnewsasia was non accessible for a bloody length of almost 2 weeks to 3 weeks.
Why? i have absolutely no reason.
So for all those who are wondering, i am still alive and kicking. Thank you very much.
Plus i am reasonably crazy with spending. Keep buying useless and VERY expensive shit.
Eating like a real cow too. Surprised that i am not gaining weight. haha! Thank goodness.
Will go update myself by mass reading all your blogs provided i can access them hahahaha!
Till the next time i feel inspired enough to bitch or rant i'll pop by again.

Cheers to accessible blog! haha!

moo.

WOOT?

2008-03-09T14:39:00.000+08:00

With every step, you leave one behind.
Every breath you take, brings you closer to your last.
That’s how it is and how it always will be.
Just seven odd months into my current pseudo expatriate life and I feel aged.
Perhaps its all the things I am missing out
People, events, venues.
Even my former lifestyle
Craving for anything Singaporean today
Anything remotely related to playing Chinese instruments
Anything to being around familiar faces, familiar places, familiar feelings
Nothing much I can do.
Really.
Except constantly reminding myself to
“Focus!”
“Keep your eyes on the prize”

But who am I kidding?
I cannot even convince myself
What prize? Where? When? How?
Uncertainties rule my life
Will strive to put a more positive spin to things everyday
But the pessimistic Capricorn prevails
As usual.

Oh well.

Moo.

Hongkong Therapy

2008-03-02T14:35:00.000+08:00

Hongkong Rocks! As usual. It is a place with countless splurging sites, be it retail or F&B (Food & Beverages).

I succumbed! As usual. Particularly to overpriced, expensive looking and reasonably tasting food. Technically, you could call me a pig. Perhaps I should start oinking and stop mooing all together.

That said. I have broken one of the very few New Year resolutions of having to stop splurging on overpriced shit. They say pictures tell a thousand words. So I shall leave the talking to the pictures then. Enjoy. =)

Starting from left
1) Assorted Laver Rice Cookies 9 Pcs (405kcal)
2) Soymilk & Okra Pound Cake 110g (374kcal)
3) Lemon Marshmallows 105g (351kcal)
4) Sugarless Super Mint 28g (78kcal)
5) Pasta Sauce Arrabbiata 290g (????kcal)
6) Chocolate Cream Puff 93g (579kcal)

Total Expenditure = 87 HKD. =P

Retail therapy always works. Sweet food and snacking does not really do much for your waist line, but they do wonders for weary hearts and exhausted minds. =) Trust me on that! Haha! Also, nothing feels as great as blogging while immersing your exhausted feet in a pail of hot deodorizing lemongrass foot soak. Heaven! (Thanks Ken!!!!!) =)

Food Soak!

On a side note, I am not going to India afterall. That’s out of the picture for the next month or so. And YES all that can be confirmed about my life is barely 1 month down the road. That’s how unpredictable work can be for me. Haiz. Yup.

Moo.

This blog is becoming a weird monologue by an old & weary man with nothing better to do. Perhaps i should stop it all together.

Statement to Myself

2008-02-24T14:34:00.000+08:00

I don’t like waiting. What I am waiting for does not really matter actually. I just don’t enjoy the act of waiting. Although there is a Chinese saying “好事值得等待” (roughly translated as good stuff are worth waiting for), but to me, its just bullshit cooked up from some self declared saintly asshole. Haha.

Yet strangely, however much I don’t like waiting, I occasionally still either intentionally or unintentionally unleash the terrible feeling of waiting onto others. Yet another Chinese saying, “己所不欲勿施于人” (Do not do onto others what you do not fancy).

Pardon me for all who have waited for me and whom will wait for me in one way or another. I apologise in advance.

This is yet another one of those senseless entries, whose sole purpose is probably to remind me that I shall learn to be a better person everyday. Perhaps this could be considered as one of my resolutions for 2008.

Minimise time that others spend waiting for me, which could otherwise have been avoided.

Moo (Funky mood)

Mule

2008-02-19T14:31:00.000+08:00

I was a mule today. Metaphorically, of course. For those who are uninformed, the term mule is commonly given to a person who is carrying something (contraband or illegal and most commonly drugs) across some distance (commonly customs) for someone or some organization.

For me, the items carried were not drugs, not usually illegal unless you bring it across customs undeclared and of course, the distance was across the customs. What made it even scarier was the large quantity of this item that I had to carry across in my haversack. It did not help that I was sweating like a pig from the gross weight of the items when I was walking across the customs with all the custom officers staring at me. Thankfully, they did not feel that I was “suspicious” enough and did not stop me at all.

I’m sure you are wondering by now why the heck did I do this? Well, it all began with an innocent question of “Hey! Can your passport allow you to enter and exit China freely?” Naturally, my reply was an equally ignorant “Yes.” With this tiny little word, both me and my other Singaporean colleague were “arrowed” and had to follow two other colleagues to do this extremely dreaded task.

This brings me to another question. How far would you go to not offend any of your superiors or colleagues? How many rules would you break for your work? How do you even say no to something like that?

Perhaps, this is my introductory module to Office Politics 101. Perhaps I have already failed it terribly. Hopefully, by the time the next request for “help” of this sort comes along, I would have figured out how to say no politely and firmly, without jeopardizing, my career.

___________________________________________________________________

Mild Troubled.
Tee Hawwww.

2008

2008-02-17T14:28:00.000+08:00

6 Months into my job
No achievements to date
Shall not list any new year resolutions as i don't usually adhere to any
No resolutions = no failures = no disappointments
Just how amazingly fucked up can i be manx? haha!

Shall start my 1st entry for this year with something more light hearted by displaying my wonderous stockpile of snacks from Muji Hongkong

Starting from left
1) Soymilk & Okra Pound Cake 110g (374kcal)
2) Strawberry Marshmallows 105g (348kcal)
3) Pea Snack 60g (344kcal)
4) Yoghurt Cranberry Chocolate 72g (338kcal)
5) Sugarless Super Mint 28g (78kcal)

Total expenditure : Around 15 sgd

Oh! 1 other silly thing i did. I actually bought a airtight plastic container to store my snacks so i don't and won't finish them at 1 go. Haha!
Aging = lower metabolism = fatty me!
Silly thoughts on a silly day.

Moo.

__________________________________________________________________

PS: Strangely, just last night i dreamt that i cooked a feast for my friends here and i was actually temted to buy a pot today. My very first pot! But my wallet stopped me. Thankfully. hahahaha!
Tu me manques beaucoup. (Is it gramatically correct? Hmmm.)

__________________________________________________________________

Snack Stash

Bad Day?

2007-12-03T14:27:00.000+08:00

Every once in awhile, there will be days where nothing seems right
Today, seems to be it
Again
Nothing particular has happened
And yet this weird feeling of helplessness overcame me
Perhaps it’s a culmination of events
I don’t really know
Truly
I wonder sometimes
Whether this is right and where this is leading
But I can conclude nothing
It may seem strange that a person like me
Who always seem to be jovial and slightly insane could feel so
Perhaps its true that I am insane
I think too much
And yet I think too little
I ponder, question and ridicule at my silliness
And lack of common sense
Again, with no end in sight

This is yet another one of those entries
Which does not seem to make sense at all
And yet it could mean so much

The fact that I am writing this during working hours, hiding from my friends and acquaintances may even indicate my need for inner peace
Craving for seclusion
And yet, most of the other times, I am afraid of loneliness
How very strange right?
Don’t ask why
In fact don’t even ask
Pretend that this entry was never written in the first place
I justify my writing only for the sole aim of documenting the frequency of these “days”
Hopefully, its just one of those “days”
Where I need and should be left alone.
Bah
__________________________________________________________________
Side note: What a grand entry back to my barely empty blog ehy? Oh well. Am fine now. So, to all those who are worrying or considering to worry, don’t and thanks.

Life As A Half Fucked Expat

2007-11-05T14:24:00.002+08:00

Yes, I am unofficially an expatriate from Singapore working in Shenzhen China.
BUT!
I am not a full fledged expatriate, but a Half Fucked one.
YES!
You did not read it wrongly. Half Fucked = me.
WHY?
Let me break it down for you readers this way.

Expatriate Traits
· Working overseas
· Paid overseas allowance
· Living conditions slightly better than the commonest worker here
· Treated slightly better than the locales
· Being about to spout & write a language that few others fully comprehend

Non Expatriate Traits
· Squeezing in crazily “aromatic” buses literally packed to the brim
· Unable to afford anything in the shops catered for the expatriates
· Working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week (1 hour of break for lunch and dinner)
· Working as a operator on a production line requiring minimal brain activity (for now)
· Unable to enjoy any public holidays be it from the home or host country
· Meals are mainly consumed at many joints where meat origin may be questionable (e.g pork may not be from pigs or mutton may not be from sheep)
· Drastic alteration or modifications to basic lifestyle needs (e.g no MP3 players allowed, which = JUST KILL ME!Thank you very much.)
· Mandatory uniform of disgustingly over-sized and ugly company polo tees (Just so you guys know, they forced me to take XXL, the largest size!!!!!)
· Unpredictable home trip or home leave timings
· ALLOWANCE STILL NOT BANKED IN!!!!!
· And many many more….

TRUE!
I am freaking biased and extremely myopic in terms of my point of views
BUT
Who gives a damn?! NOT ME!!!

THE END of 1 bitching session.

Moo.

NB: You’ll see an attached photo with the oversized polo tee and my company name tag.

___________________________________________________________________________________

Random Shot on Foxconn Bus

Choices?

2007-10-16T14:24:00.000+08:00

Life is all about choices.
Choosing what you eat for dinner
Choosing to watch that pirated dvd instead of in the theaters
Choosing to fly many thousands of miles to work instead of staying at home
Choosing to spend numerous hours online hoping to chat with your friends instead of just plain old sleeping or reading the news or doing something more productive
Choosing to continuously babble mindlessly online, bare for all to see
Choosing to speak up or not
Choosing to selectively share information to whoever
Choosing to just continue breathing
But choosing to be happy?
I doubt so. It is seldom so easy. I wished it were though. Really. Perhaps my past encounter with depression was never really gone. I think sooooo much sometimes that it scares me. Perhaps my intellect combined with my pessimism is just too developed for my puny little mind to handle. (Haha! What a way to praise and belittle myself in 1 sentence ehy?)

How often do you feel like you are stuck in situations when you don’t really have a choice?

For me? Too many. Way too many that I would really like.

The most recent one was the posting to a team which will take effect after 3 months of training here. Basically I was “chosen” to be in the team by pure elimination and the following factors.

· I am TOO NICE
· I did quite OK for some of the hands-on tests we had
· My passport is good for easy application for visas to most countries.

Basically, I am to be in a team to learn to become a technical guru and walking manual for all if not most of the machines used in the manufacturing of mobile phones, so I can fly to places (commonly third world or developing nations) to assist in the setting of new plants or new production lines and assist them till their mass production stabilizes. Put it in an even simpler way, I am just some glorified technician with a better degree. As good as this may sound to many of you reading this, just so you know, all four of us here were all NOT too keen on this position because of the technicality and the “menial” labour style of working as compared to the other positions in other teams. Guess you can say yours truly is the very lucky one ehy? Since when did being nice and hands-on enough be something you should be penalized on? Shouldn’t I be given more choice? Perhaps this is reality. The cold and harsh working world, where choices and preferences don’t really matter anymore.

I know I should not give up and bitch about stuff that I have not really encountered first hand yet. But can you blame me? Literally having this post shoved down my throat, while the rest more or less could choose a little and have slightly more managerial roles which provides more interaction with external customers.

Sometimes I just wonder. Where will this lead me? BUT. As the saying goes, ”If you never try, you will never know” . Or will I?

Moody, over-analyzing and overly pessimistic.
As usual.

Blah!

2007-10-08T14:23:00.000+08:00

Really bad start for my 2nd month anniversary here in Shenzhen. Or in very song2 (hokkien) mama languang, sibei freaking suay.

It all began with what started out to be a normal and seemingly very pleasant Sunday to Shenzhen city. We went around buying stuff at some comparatively very expensive supermarket specially catered for expatriates and Chinese with very unique tastes. Some interesting items there are Ayam brand tuna, Crocodile meat and foreign liquor like Bailey’s, Kahlua and Paulaner Beer. Naturally, due to its uniqueness, the prices are also considerably “unique”. Anyways, I went to spulrge on some fruit and nuts muesli to go with yoghurt for breakfast, so I could FINALLY escape from the monotony of eating bread for breakfast everyday. (For those who are uninformed, I DON”T LIKE BREAD)

Of course, as always, for me, I ALWAYS digress when doing grocery shopping and ended up buying some “extras” namely, Ritter Sport Biscuit (Stupid Yiing got me hooked! :P) and some German candies. Which cost significantly more expensive than anywhere in Singapore. Haha! I RAWK! See attached photos for my spoils of war.

The weird ass euphoria which arose from god knows where lasted only till the end of the grocery shopping trip. Its like a shitty mood just came out of nowhere and bit me in the ass. Basically I started to behave like a spoilt bitch. Complain about hot weather. Complain about walking too fast. Complain about wanting to sit down. Complain about wanting to go home. Complain, complain, complain. Even I myself cannot stand me.

Naturally, with my incessant nagging and the cooperation of my very nice friends we left town for home rather early giving me a lot of time to slowly prepare myself for bed and have a good rest for the long week of work ahead. Then, the worst possible case of insommia struck. Buddy asked me, why insommia? Missing Singapore and its people? Maybe, probably, but it is definitely not the only reason. My mind just refused to stop moving. On nothing particularly, but loads of nonsensical stuff. One example would be like "Damn the cockroach in my room. Why can’t I find it?”. And tonnes of other ridiculous and rather unimportant stuff. It was only till around 4 am then I finally went into lala land.

This morning I was rudely woke up by the bloody freaking air conditioning unit in the house malfunctioning and causing the circuit breaker to trip. And yours truly is typing this entry in the horrendous heat. ARGH. What makes matters worse is that the estimated "repair duration" by the hostel admin stuff = 1 week! 1 bloody mother fucking week! ARGH. (Kindly excuse the lingo. Extreme situations take for extreme lingo)

Streak of bad luck. Again?

Or am I just over-reacting? Again?

Whatever. Blah!

Bonkers in Shenzhen

2007-10-03T14:22:00.000+08:00

Yuqin complained that day I don’t blog often enough. Buddy complained on yet another day that my blog is dead.
Yiing also complained why am I not writing.
Angeline just read my blog when I am writing this entry.
Of course not forgetting Victor my dear old ex roomie who pops in to read and leave some comments for those very miserable few entries I have came up with so far.

It made me realise, that my blog does have its very limited charm and audience, where every once in awhile, some faithful readers will pop by and take a look. Thank you very much for that. Truly. =)

Then I decided to evaluate myself. Why am I writing so little? Why do I have so little to rant these days? The mood? Perhaps. The venue and its restrictions? Perhaps. Plain laziness? Nah, have always been lazy. Perhaps it is just a culmination of all the above factors. I am not depressed, sad or happy enough. China blocks blogspot and this windows live spaces shit for some reason does not allow me to sort or post my photos easily. And of course, I am just freaking lazy. Haha!

Enough about that, next up, confessions.

I am so so so sorry for forgetting the birthdays of the following people. So here is a super belated birthday wish,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGELINE!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELVIN!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHEYA!

NB: The above was arranged purely in alphabetical order and of no preference at all. =)

This entry is damn lame.
Whatever.

Moo.

Bonkers in Shenzhen

I Hate Having Flu!

2007-09-26T23:39:00.000+08:00

I know. It has been a really long while since I last updated my blog. Again. Haha! But that’s me. Have been feeling a little under the weather for the past week or so. I guess it could be called a seasonal flu, as many other locale Chinese are also getting it, so much so that while getting some meds from the locale pharmacy today, there was actually a long queue at the cashier, all holding some form of flu meds either for themselves or their kids.

Nothing particularly interesting has happened for the past few weeks, except the usual chore of waking up at 650 am every morning and rushing like mad to catch the company bus to reach the company on time. And like clockwork, every weekend (Sunday only, course I have to work on Saturdays), we will wake up around 11 and go to some place near our place for Chee Cheong Fun and then take a 1 hour bus ride to Shenzhen city just to walk around and immerse in what little civilization and fashion that this city/country could provide.

Yesterday was mooncake festival. It is a rather big event here in China, as some of the colleagues actually mentioned that it is the second most important festival after Chinese New Year for reunion and family events. For me, when I was in Singapore, it was almost always a must that I have to rush home for dinner with my parents, but, naturally, being here in Shenzhen I cannot do that, SO, I rounded up the other 3 Singaporean fuckers (oops. Haha). Together we went to get 1 box of mooncakes and watched a DVD coupled with some plum wine and beer. Basically, the mooncake sucked big time. Cheap ass, low grade burnt lian2 rong2 paste and horrendously dry egg yolk. But the day was made a lot better by the shiok plum wine and the power mama moon. Haha! (Man I love Singlish!)

What was most memorable about the day would probably have to be the dvd and the moon, which made me think of many places and most importantly friends and family. The show I watched was called Reign Over Me, which is a story about life of a man who lost his family to the 911 incident and the help that his friend provided him to help him move on. This brought back many memories of my horrible days in JC, where I had depression and all. All of which I managed to survive only through the help my dearest friend, who himself is going through a really terrible patch now and truly, I feel really guilty for not being able to be there when this friend needs it most. If you are reading this, stay strong my friend, you can do it! =)

Wishing you were here.
Tu me manques.

Ciao~~~~~

Off of to nurse my bloody flu. =(
Enjoy the attached photos =)

华强路

Shenzhen Train

Cheese!

永和大王

Coco Park

Walmart

Coco Park2

Ass In My Face! :(

Damn My Bloody Mouth

2007-08-27T23:38:00.000+08:00

Hate my mouth sometimes. Truly I do. I can be so bluntly honest that I many cases I could only be called an ultimate dumbass. Being constantly truthful is not good and I mean it. It can be really crap at times especially when it comes to playing mind games or political games in the work environment. Which is just ultimate crap either way you choose to play your game. Basically, all you have are only 2 options.

Option 1: Be and idiot (like me so far) and answer every question truthfully

Outcome: Offend your colleagues or worse still your boss, usually unintentionally, as you may be seen as “sabo-ing”, “fly-kite-ing” or just “fucking aournd”.

Option 2: Tailor your answers to all questions depending on your audience and be ready to warp or alter “the truth” to please people.

Outcome: Seemingly happy colleagues and bosses, BUT at an extremely high price as you would constantly be weaving this intricate web of “half truths” or “lies”, which also means that you would have to remember exactly what you said to who. In fact, it is a huge ass bomb waiting to go off the moment you lose focus or accidentally slip.

Well I guess, this is working life ain’t it? I personally feel that all companies should be evaluated by “politics specialists” whom will determine the level and the extent of office politics that occur in very company AND recommend the extra amount of allowance or pay to give to their employees who have to deal with this EXTRA work. Haha!

I guess I am just plain silly or just wayyyyyy too naïve regarding this shit. Time to grow up and FAST!

Sigh. Moo~~~~~

PS: Here is just a short list of the things which are already considered as taboo to be spoken of by us, as Singaporean new employees, namely, my pay, my allowance, my place of accommodation, Singaporean average pay, China politics, Taiwan politics, religion, independence rights and the list goes on…..

I Got Too Close?

2007-08-22T23:37:00.000+08:00

Actually I wanted to blog about this yesterday but was so exhausted these few days that I ended up dozing off at 2230 hours for 2 days in a row. Well, here it is, finally haha!

WE as Singaporeans usually have this mindset of how self-centered and inconsiderate some or most lowly educated Chinese could be. (by Chinese I am referring to local mainlanders from China) Admit it. How many times have we used the rather degrading term of “Ah Tiong” to refer to them? Well, argue all you want, but I’m sure we are all guilty of the stereotypical thinking once in awhile.

Enough of that mambo jumbo of mindless banter and back to my story. Just yesterday while going on with my mindless operator job at my 7th day at the printer (applies solder paste to PCBs or printed circuit boards in all your handphones), while opening a new packet of new PCBs, my hand slipped and accidentally broke and separated 1 piece from the co-joining pieces from 1 PCB (Each PCB is made up of 4 pieces of handphone boards joined by very weak and tiny joints, I broke 2 joints basically.). This, under their Standard Operating Procedures would require the line manager to come screw me a bit then ask me to sign a form claiming all responsibility and accept any punishment (usually a fine of 200 RMB).

Me, being a way too honest Singaporean went up to the line manager to tell her the truth instead of some cock and bull story about the board being broken before I opened it, expecting to receive some scolding and all. But guess what? My 师傅, 1 other co-worker who stands next to me everyday (together, everyday, the 3 of us struggle to make ridiculous targets set by the management) and 1 technician went to talk to the line manager (also my friend la actually), asking her to not write that fault report and ask her to help me cover. And guess what? She did! Without blinking an eye! Despite it causing the entire line a little more hassle and compromising the end product quality. Man! Was I flattered and very very embarrassed at the same time for making such a careless mistake. But I guess, it can be summarized in 2 words again. 关系 or relationships are what drive the working environment in China. I was very lucky to have tasted the sweet end of it first.

It is today that I was informed by my trainer (an Indian) at the line that we would be moving on to another station tomorrow and may be transferred to another building for purposes of facilitating the training. It was then I realised. Out of the 300000 employees, I was very fortunate to interact with some very nice and kind ones and whom I may no longer see ever again from tomorrow onwards. I felt a sudden tinge of sadness, that the friendships (or acquaintances) that I built up for the past week or so may be gone just by the snap of a finger. Did I get too close to people leading to such vulnerability?

Cherish your friends, your family. Everyday of your life. You will never know when you will lose them. (OPPS! I think sentimental and emotional moo struck again. Haha!)

Ciao! Moo~~~~~

NB: Some Nelly Furtado Songs can sound realllllllllly horrible. Haha!

5th Day as an Operator! Wee!

2007-08-17T23:34:00.002+08:00

Today was day 5 of my life as an operator on the very 1st station of the making of a Printed Circuit Board (PCB) or the green shit board like thing that is in your hand phone when you open it up. Oh! I just realized I forgot to inform you guys that I am in the MPB (Mobile Phone Board) deparrtment, ODM (Original Design Manufacturer) Section of the WLBG (Wireless Buisness Group) under FIH (Foxconn International House => Check out their Stocks! Hahaha! ). That is one huge ass of a description with no explanation ehy? Haha! In simpler terms, my department designs or co-designs and manufactures mobile phone boards for mobile phone companies. Nokia is my department’s main focus.

Enough of that crap. Back to day 5 of my operator life. I reached the company in a really sleepy state course I had an extremely bad night last night from constantly waking up to cramps in my calves. Argh! Any brilliant and cheap solutions to this?

For my current life as an operator, all I have to do is fit the circuit boards onto some other boards and load it into some machine. This requires hardly any skills or techniques, just extreme stamina as you will be doing it for the whole bloody day from 830 am to 530 pm, STANDING! To makes matter worse you have to wear some anti static bracelet, attached to a short cable and which is fixed to a stationary table, greatly limiting your movement to a tiny space of approximately 1.5 metre radius around you. To put it in simpler terms I am sharing the plight of a chained up dog. Haha!

But life ain’t all that bad here. So don’t worry about me. There are times where we could escape from the monotony of factory operations through events like lunch, meetings, trainings, briefing and feedback sessions. Our very rare trainings are held by an Indian called Saravanen (Who does not really understand what we are asking half the time. And the other half of the time we don’t understand what the hell is he talking about! Haha!).

Yup that is all for now. Exhausted from standing all day! Haha! And finally Junyen is here too! Wee! Our team of fantastic 4 Singaporeans are here! Wee!

Last but not least, HI MOM! HI BRO! HI DAD! I know you guys are reading this! Haha! (Lucky I cut down my vulgarities like F***! Haha!)

Ciao! Moo~~~~

1st official blog entry written in Shenzhen

2007-08-14T23:30:00.000+08:00

Wee!

Yesterday was the first day of work for me after a gruelling 3 day course in Chinese which encompassed 12 hours of lessons everyday with only 1 miserly hour of lunch and half an hour of dinner in between, To makes things worse, they had to conduct the whole bloody course in Chinese and the notes were in TRADITIONAL CHINESE. Goodness! We had to survive a 80 MCQ exam at the end too. Which somehow all 3 of us here miraculously passed. I seriously wonder how? As i barely managed to finish reading and answering all the questions. But oh well. Hahaha.

Today, i was asked by the HR to go for a mandatory healthcheck as prescribed by the company and the local government. I was chauffered to the hospital (In Shenzhen City, an approxcimnately 45 min car ride from the workplace). The ride there was considerably uneventful with the usual jams, bad driving etiquette and loads of horning. The only more "exciting" thing that occured had to be the "妈的!" that my driver screamed out after a bright white flash, where he asked me if he was photographed by the traffic police for smoking and driving at the same time. I was actually genuinely shocked. Not because he asked me the question or at how similar the laws are compared to Singapore. In fact i was amazed that the police would even be bothered with smoking with driving when the road conditions of extreme reckless driving, ridiculous overtaking and an occasional vehicle driving in the OPPOSITE direction.

That's all for now. Getting reallly tired from the work and all. Will update more on me living here soon.

Ciao! Moo~~~~~

Weak

2007-08-03T23:10:00.000+08:00

It's been 3 or 4 days
The deed was supposed to have been done
Case closed
Finito
But I realized
Nothing is as simple as it seems
Not usually the quitter in any scenario
Strangely I still hurt
And ache
And ponder
I guess I need a little more time for this to go away
As fast as possible
I hope
In desperate need to move on
___________________________________________________________________

A patch on a quilt
A single pixel on a screen
A dot on the world map
A drop of water in the ocean
A grain of sand in the desert
1 insignificant me

Weather Today

2007-08-02T08:35:00.001+08:00

Date : 02/08/2007

Beautiful morning sun
Peering through the towering trees
Wonderfully pale blue skies
Dotted with fluffy white clouds
Hopefully it stays this way
Doom and gloom go away
Thank you very much

Music: 郭美美 - 爱是你眼里的一首情歌
Labels: Linkin Park – What I've Done

The 2 People You Meet In A Day

2007-08-01T18:21:00.000+08:00

Been wanting to blog about this for sometime. But, well, the past few days have been nothing short of crazyiness. Hence the delay.

Person Number 1

Just 5 days ago, after my convocation ceremony (shall post pictures on this soon) and was on the train travelling to VivoCity to chill out a stranger walked up to me and dumped his namecard onto my lap. This stranger then promptly moved to one end of the cabin (i was seated in the centre of the cabin) and bascially started to steal occasional glances at me as if waiting for my reaction.

Naturally, anybody's reaction would be the same as mine. Utter shock. Memories of namecard peddlers on the Shanghainese Metro kept flashing through my head. But this is Singapore not Shanghai, China. How could this be happening? There has to be some law somewhere prohibiting this? Or am i wrong? Anyways, what i did was expected, where i tried to return the namecard and said thanks but no thanks. The stranger's reaction was nothing short of bizzare.

"Keep it. You will need it....." (Naturally i tried my utmost best to smile and continue returning the card)

"You remember me?"
"No!"
"STTS. 1 week course?"
"OH!" (Sudden revelation of being recognised by my trainee from my army days)
"So do you recognise me?"
"Sorry i don't. I am so sorry about that. Thought you were some salesman."

We proceed to go on chatting about our lives after Army. He went on to enquire about my current employment status and degree i was holding. AND very surprisingly he went on to say he could get me a job in some very prestigious company with very good pay. Naturally i have to turn him down as i am already employed. How strange fate plays out itself, sometimes.

Person Number 2

I got off next at Vivocity, had dinner, shopped around and while boarding the escaltor to bring me up to the cinemas to get movie tickets, a stranger who was riding down started staring at me. Which triggered me to look just back (Look not Stare. I'm reasonably polite most of the time okay. ^^) Then he started talking.

"Do you remember me?"
"No. I'm sorry"
"STTS, signal course. You were one of the instructors?"
"OH! I'm sorry i could not recognise you." (Looking reasonably shocked and embarassed)
"Its ok. You took so many trainees. I'm sure you get this all the time?"
Mumbling "No not all the time. Just TWICE today....."

Again. Twice in a day. Naturally my goldfish memory does not help at all. A slightly more comforting thought was that thousands of trainees sat through my lessons, so i guess, a little amnesia time and agian would be fine. Right? haha.

These people i met that day, left me wondering. How many people's lives have u affected through your everyday actions? How many people who remember you course you were once significant in their lives? And among these people, how many do you actually remember or cared to remember? And yet among these people, how many of them had a postive impression of you? The face they last saw, was it friendly or enemity?

Fate is a funny thing. It kints this intricate web, crosslinking the lives of people who would otherwise be strangers before the "immaculate" or "cursed" meeting.

Be as nice to as many people as you can every single day of your life. You never know when these "accquaintances" will come bite your ass off or kiss you on your cheek, one day, many years down the road.

Music: Rihanna - Umbrella

一個人生活

2007-07-25T16:48:00.001+08:00

Today I went to put my signature down on a piece of paper
Which came with 4 other pages of text
Terms and conditions I guess
Excitement lasted for the next 30 minutes talking to the HR
While I was walking out of the office
Very strangely, a wee bit, a tiny tinge of regret started gnawing at me

Family, Friends, Basically all the people and the Singapore
What now?

Emotional me is starting to take over the rational one
Am really very fine so don’t yall worry
Just need to really accept the fact I am a working adult
An engineer to be exact
No longer the “Forever 17” frivolous nutcase
Probably I have to give up the moos too

Another phase of life
Another minor crisis
In yet another day of a silly cow’s life

我想我可以習慣一個人生活
我想我可以假裝不曾愛過
冰涼的夜裡讓眼淚溫熱我

我想我可以習慣一個人生活
在記憶裡面擦去你的承諾
愛情怎麼會是這個結果

我想我可以習慣一個人生活
我想我可以假裝不曾愛過
感覺如果要走誰能說 NO

我想我可以習慣一個人生活
在記憶裡面擦去你的承諾
愛情是個夢而我睡過頭

Short Update

2007-07-25T11:17:00.001+08:00

Mom's fine
Thankfully
Shenzhen's next
Scarily
That's all
For now
Yup

胡思乱想

2007-07-23T23:03:00.000+08:00

Was flipping through my old organizers (JC days) and found these. Scribbled on one of the pages. Man was I troubled then. Still these were beautifully composed and copied of course. I do not have so much 墨水. Enjoy!

众里寻她千百度
蓦然回首
那人却在灯火阑珊处
(Has this happened to you?)

本待将心向明月
谁知明月照沟渠
(This I personally feel is suaning people. Haha!)

东边日出西边雨
道是无晴还有晴天
(Cheem one here. But uncertainty at its best.)

问世间情为何物
直叫人生死相许
(Made famous by The Condor Heroes)

两情若是久长时
又岂在朝朝暮暮
(Very true)

曾经沧海难为水
除去巫山不是云
(Cheemelogy. Makes you feel kinda old and weary.)

枝上柳绵吹又少
天涯何处无芳草
(Promotes multiple partners. Haha!)

命里有时终须有
命里无时莫强求
(So very very true)

Music: 林凡 - 我的八月怎麼過 (Hmm What a conincidence! August my month of upheaval)
Mood: 胡思乱想

Always Pissed

2007-07-18T10:03:00.001+08:00

Am so temperamental these days
One moment i will be smiling
The next i could be sad / depressed
And the rest of the time i would be angry and pissed
The last being the most prevalent mood these days

Just a simple example would be early this morning
A short simple trip to the market with my mom
And boy was i pissed
More than half the time
With ridiculously petty thoughts like
"Why so early?"
"Why so heavy?"
And very scaringly the following
"Why me?"
"Why can't i just live my own life and do what i really want?"

Selfish
Inconsiderate
And a total bitch
That would be me
___________________________________________________________________
Serioulsy need to get a control of my emotions before i start hurting people knowingly or unknowingly

7 more days

2007-07-17T12:20:00.000+08:00

My mom's biopsy went well
She's recuperating at home now
Thank you all for your smses and calls and tags and everything that you guys do
Been quite a bitch for the past few days
Black faced
Stoned faced
Pissed faced
Sleepy faced
7 more days to knowing what the *toot* is going on
The wait should be over soon
Hopefully

Oh Well

2007-07-13T09:46:00.000+08:00

The moment i was dreading for all this while.....
The HR lady for my Shenzhen job offer called up about signing of contracts today
Well, i spitted out everything about the biopsy and stuff
Surprisingly, all she said was "ok, update me"
That was it
Seriously i doubt she believes me
She is probably thinking that this clown here is just trying to buy more time
But oh well
What has to be done has been done
Am actually quite speechless
2 more days to Hsinghai Concert
3 More days to biopsy
??? days to peace

Praying hard these days
But it is so amazing
A free thinker like me
Who does not really believe in anything
And who does not really Don't believe in anything
Praying to who, praying to what
I doubt it works at all
Blind faith is all i have anyway
Faith in what? Fate?
hahahaha.
Oh well
Silly thoughts on a silly Friday morning

Mood : Plain crap

Thank You & Sorry

2007-07-12T00:01:00.000+08:00

I overreacted.
As usual.
But think i could be excused. Right?

Thank you for all your nice and encouraging smses, calls and tags on my board
I also find it so very surprising and yet honoured that you guys are checking out my blog
In fact, more frequently than i do write and for that
Thank you again

Sorry for disappearing and shutting out practically everyone from this for all these while
Sorry to KP and LG for me screwing up my schedules and messed up life
Sorry to the misleading word "operation" it should be "biopsy" instead
Sorry for over-reacting
Sorry to all those who care

Thank you for bearing with me and reading through this weird shit article.
And sorry if it sucks.
I bet it does.
Oh well.....

Music - None
Mood - Apolegetic

Another Trial?

2007-07-05T17:49:00.000+08:00

Seriously.
God or whatever higher being out there is out to fool me.
Truly.
I strongly believe so.
It was only yesterday i finally decided to embark on a new journey.
And today,
I recieved news which could only be termed as a pending disaster,
News that my mom needs to go for an operation
On the 16th
For the removal of a growth near her nose bridge
To determine whether the growth is cancerous or not
Needless to say
If it turns out badly i will stay
No questions asked
But of course i am hoping
Hoping not entirely course i really wanna go to China
But mainly hoping that my mom would be fine
Trial after trial
Its only 25 years thus far
How much more do you want me to go through
Is this just another trial?
I have survived so many
I believe i would survive again
But why me?
Why this time?
I really don't know
Emotions now?
Not anger, not sadness, not regret, not nothing
But this sheer fear and utter despair
Perhaps, just perhaps
I admit defeat
Finally

Mood - ?
Music - John Mraz- I'm Yours (Its playing in the background anyway)

Leave me alone, you bloody mother fucker. Why can't you just let me be happy?
___________________________________________________________________

Have decided to keep the feel good song as my blog song. But now, it almost seems pathetic and gloating rather than happy. Oh well, life is this way ain't it so?
___________________________________________________________________

I am so silly
Just so silly
The lack of exercise and outdoor activities has dulled my brain
After a short jog and loads of panting, i finally realised
This is not about me
Nothing at all
I'm sorry for even thinking and writing the above crap
But it shall not be deleted and shall stay as a lesson to me
Good luck mom
I hope everything turns out fine
Please be fine

Lyrics of Da Song Playing.....

2007-07-04T11:01:00.000+08:00

John Mraz - I'm Yours

Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks
and now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out
I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some
I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours
Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love
Listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
A lá peaceful melody
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved
So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
My breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a new face and laughed
I guess what I'm saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do
Our name is our virtue
I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
No need to complicate
Our time is short
It can not wait, I'm yours
Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
A lá one big family (2nd time: A lá happy family)
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love love love
I won't hesitate no more
Oh no more no more no more
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved, I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
No I won't hesitate no more, no more
This cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, The sky is yours...

Finally

2007-07-04T10:14:00.000+08:00

Decided.
Shenzhen it will be.
Amazed at how much peace it brings.
Perhaps
I will be able to rest better tonight.
Finally.

Thanks to all.
Who have been nice and provided a listening ear to this indecisive cow.
You know who you are.

Mood: Relived
Music: Random tracks of my bro's comp

Dilemma

2007-07-02T08:42:00.000+08:00

Confused. Dilemma after dilemma. It never seems to end, When will it end? Will it end?

Shenzhen vs Singapore.
Career vs family & friends & CO & comfort zone & familiarity etc etc.....
Uncertainty with probability of succeess vs possible 'safer' route
Further studies (Waiting in vain?) vs Work
Fucking lying bastard (feels better) vs plain old bastard (irresponsible & easier way out)

Read an article in the Straits Times today (220707) . Titled,
Chasing the Dream vs Bring home the Bacon....

Guess it basically sums up what the heck i am going through all these while
More muggertoad (Dream) vs Work (Bacon)

Even blogging feels weird these days.
Blog vs Close down

I have to move on. Eventually. Or do i?

Mood- Utterly confused and in need of a friendly hug
Music - John Mraz - I'm Yours (10th spin today. At least.)

___________________________________________________________________

Some photos in the exhaustingly heavy (both metaphorically and literally) blue gown. Enjoy.....
___________________________________________________________________

Last Supper

2007-04-22T12:03:00.000+08:00

So many "lasts" this recently that it is starting to feel really sad. Last lecture, last tutorial, last report submission, last CO performance and now my very last supper as a student in hall and during exam periods. Oh! I forgot to mention that exam periods are generally categorised by the following 10 activities

1) Eat & Caffeinating (Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner, Supper I, Supper II, Tea Break I, Tea Break II, SNACKS!!!)

2) Movies (Approximately once a week)

3) Retail therapy (Anything man. Truely anything. Think the worst was in year 1 when i bought 100 dollars of DVD at one go to store for viewing purposes after exams)

4) Sleeping till late noon and not sleeping till early morning

5) Blogging excessively

6) Loads of gaming (Audition, DOTA, Maple Story, Gunbound, RON, RO, Dragonfable etc etc!)

7) TV Serials (It never fails. I'll always start watching one during exams and will usually finish an entire season in record time, typically 1 to 2 days)

8) Swmming, jogging, training for marathon (which i have not been doing much lately piggy alert!)

9) Talking, crapping, chatting and bitching about exasperations of life and examinations

10) AND FINALLY a liiitttleee bit of mugging (Who am i to blame for having so few As? haha!)
_________________________________________________________________________________

Here are the photos from my last supper haha! Those present are junyen (the other guy lor, my study budddy - male) and yiing yng a.k.a SWMOFF (the only female in the pic, my study buddy - female) :P

Me and Yiing with our strawberry sundaes! (Courtesy of 24-hours Macdonald's delivery)

Three of us trying to Zi Pai and fit into the screen of the handphone camera 3.2 mp (Courtesy of yiing)

3 of us showing our spoils of war wahahahaha!

Spoils of war! 40 nuggets in total. (13.33333 each! wahahaha!) 9 packets of sauces opened.
_______________________________________________________________________

ORGY! (Please Click Here)

Found this stray photo I have to share! Note the compromising positions of the soft toys. Kinda cute ehy? But the creators' mindset (yuhui, mao and me) were far more... filthy... Tentatively i shall name it... "Leaning Tower of Lust" There! Can't believe i said it! Spoil image manx! wahahahahaha!

5 minnutes after i posted this entry - Yiing and yuhui demanded that it should be called ORGY instead! NOT ME AH! LOL!

Melonised

2007-04-19T00:48:00.000+08:00

Picture of a kitty.
Melonised.
Pissed.
Oppressed.
Probably wondering.
What am i doing?
Why did i allow this?
And yet
Oh so endearing.

Guess what?
Me too.

Moo.

Music : Rob Thomas - Something to be (Engineer? How hilarious.)
Mood : Exhausted & Weird

Cranky

2007-04-16T09:49:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, it amazes me how i could get so agitated over simple issues.

Yesterday was a horrendously bad day for yours truly. It all began with tiny little signs of not being able to concentrate on studies around noon. It was also then i realised i lost my keys, house, hall, mailbox, etc etc.
Gone.

Naturally, i went around trying to get the keys duplicated only to be very disappointed. Twice. Both keysmiths took one look at the key and said "No. We don't make this kind!" To me that was bullshit! What good is a keysmith when you cannot make a simple bloody key? Not like its brain surgery or what. GOODNESS!

After all the "Hoo Haas" of rushing around like a mad man trying to make a key (Many thanks to yiing and yen who tolerated my shit and accompanied me around), i finally returned to school only ard 2200 hours or slightly earlier AND that was after spending about 15 dollars on cab fare and meals. NOTE : STILL NO KEYS.

When i finally sat down and tried to study with what little time i had left of yesterday, this sudden wave of anger hit me. I was so angry with everything and anything. I literally felt like punching someone or something. I was pulling out hair, blasting music (IPOD), pacing up and down. NOTHING could make me concentrate. Needless to say. No studying was done. Again.

Hence, I went back to my room in hope of ending this cursed day earlier, only to realise, that i have been locked out by my roommate, even after countless reminders to ask him to not lock the door tonight when he is sleeping. But oh well, whose to blame except my own carelessness. Even that, made me more angry that ever. I took a quick shower came back, sat down on the table and attempted to study. Wave after wave of anger and exasperation kept me from concentrating on anything. Ended the cursed day with zapping monsters on DOTA.

Woke up really early today and went to the halls of residence office in my sleeping gear. Came up with a cock and bull story of forgetting my keys at home and asked to be given a key to my room. A little of drama and anger came into play and i actually made a statement "What else you want me to do?" This only made me realise that I could have spoilt the day for the poor lady behind the desk, with my rudeness, insolence and disregard of all rules and order. I am so sorry aunty. If i ever get my lost keys back i'll apologise. If i don't TOO BAD!!!! ROAR!!!!

I should get a grip of myself. Learn to be less emotional. Grow up. Pass the bloody exams and in some ways "BE A MAN!"

Stupid, bloody idiotic, careless and foul mood MOO get out!

Perhaps, just perhaps i am really schizophrenic.

Music : 孙燕姿 - 咕叽咕叽
Mood : Really Cranky

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My nieghbours are really smelly. Was hanging my laundry and i got this overpowering whiff of their room. The smell was a combination of stale sweat and god knows what (thousand year old socks?). Mind you. Their door was closed. Errks. Darn these Ah Tiongs (for those uninformed of the term = Chinese from Mainland China). BLAH!!!!!

In case you were wondering, am just hating these smelly neighbours, i have plenty of ok smelling Chinese friends from China.

Schizo-Freak

2007-04-14T16:42:00.000+08:00

Haoyi, MacMoo, Da Niu, Da Cow, Moo. Etc etc. Some of the many names of me. This goes to show how schizophrenic the author can be. Multi personality disorder patient, I don’t think so, but definitely not your normal or average nice little man. I’m weird, I’m childish, I’m hysterical anything but normal. Leave now IF you are fearful.

Do you act differently in front of different people? Sometimes I think I do. But I think every once in awhile everyone is guilty of doing that. Think of the last time you said “Please maaaa Give me another 5 million. Thanks…” (Eyes fluttering sweetly, a.k.a sweet and obedient moo) vs “That F***ing piece of shit. Stepped on my toes again today” (Dilated pupils, flushed cheeks and enlarged nostrils, violent, vulgar and the more “Manly” moo).

Sometimes I sit there. Dazed. Thinking. Who am I? Who are the people who “like” the real me or even know the real me? How many times have you put up a false front just to be accepted or to “fit in”? Well, as you can see, this is one of those times. Again.

A friend once commented that my blog is so depressive. Can I make it less so? Blog about something happier, nicer and all? This just made me realized, perhaps I am born depressive. Beneath all the silly jokes, the mindless banter, the 99% of the time smiling face, the occasional cussing and the drunkedness, perhaps I am just a depressive freak craving for release and escape?

Why am I always blogging about this crap? I myself don’t know. Why do I even bother to expose this vulnerability to the world (World Wide Web What!), by posting this online, bare for all to see? I also don’t know.

Reading through this before posting it, also made me realise another thing about myself. My ability to communicate and express myself is either deteriorating really rapidly with my engineering studies OR, was never any good in the first place. Perhaps I ought to do something about it soon. (Don’t lie to yourself moo. You are just too lazy to care! HA!)

Wandering mind. Again. On a day where I should be desperately mugging to catch up on lost time from ineffective studying.

Oh well.

Music: Meja – All Bout Money (What isin’t right?)
Mood: Stonned

The End

2007-03-05T12:13:00.000+08:00

03/03/07.
The day that marked The End.
The End of many things.
The End of NTU Chinese Orchestra’s Annual Concert 2007.
The End of seemingly nights of camping at Nanyang House for practices.
The End of my role as a 声部长 of the 阮 section, which I held for 2 years odd.
The End of my life as a member of NTU Chinese Orchestra.

It was also the day that marked quite a few firsts
The First Time I performed as a percussionist
The First Time I laughed so hard DURING the performance
The First Time I almost dozed off during the 2nd half of the performance :P

Some of my friends always ask me “Is it worth it to spend so much time on your CCA?” or “How the hell do you balance your studies, your CCA and your FYP?”
Well, I managed.
Somehow.

Probably by sacrificing sleep, time with family and a bit of grades :P
Looking back, I would call it a bitter sweet victory.
From the day I entered as an ordinary member who cannot even play the basic notes well in Year 1, 2003, to the day I became the sectional leader of the Plucked String Section, which progressed to me becoming the ticketing officer for 2004, to the day I performed with the Orchestra in China Beijing without any prior rehearsal (Thankfully, I played OK! :P ) and finally, my role as the声部长 of the 阮 section. Whatever way you choose to see it, I would still call it a slow and steady progression.

In the orchestra, I had many names. SL (Sectional Leader), Ex SL, Ex Ex SL (which became distorted to XL and XXL, which became serious misnomers as I was and still am constantly losing weight from stress. Haha!), 暴力青年，大声牌中阮，好姨，SIAO EHY (In Hokkien), Uncle, Evil Twin, Brother, Gan Kor Kor, MOFF, Buddy, Baby, 儿子, Nellers etc, etc etc. Most of them slightly derogatory at the same time yet so endearing. Every one brings back certain memories, certain places and even certain people. It is also these names, these friendships and this level of silliness that made the long hours of practices so much more endurable and worthwhile! Thank you all for these crazy memories. Thank you all who contributed to the naming of this silly cow. =)

Am definitely looking forward to the day that will mark

The Beginning of a new chapter in my life – Work
The Beginning and setting up of the NTU Chinese Orchestra ALUMNI!(This is for u Lao EHY!)
The Beginning of many new and exciting things (Hopefully!)

*Ring!*
*Curtain Call*
*Bows & Exits*

Moo

Mood – Bitter Sweet
Music – Take That – How Deep Is Your Love

PS: Thank you ALL who came to support me all these years!!!!! =)

Pre-Graduation Bleus

2007-02-26T09:00:00.000+08:00

Just not too long ago, I was at the cross-roads of choosing between post graduate studies and work upon graduation in about 3 months time. For me, the choice was more interest driven than money driven. All I know is that I want to try my best to stay in the field of Biomaterials or its affiliated / related industries. Well, try I did, for the past few months, searching, looking, asking around for any openings in this area, BUT NO, despite being the supposedly ‘focus’ of Singapore for the past few years or so, the number of job openings in this field are pathetically limited and almost strictly restricted to the research and development field, which in Singapore, almost always means that you need at least a PHD, for any chance of advamcement in your career path. So there, my choice is obvious, postgrad studies!

However, things are seldom this simple. Just not too long ago I approached my beloved FYP supervisor and highlighted my interests of doing postgraduate studies. Well, her initial reaction was a mixture of joy and surprise. She promptly asked for my 1 page transcript containing my glorious war history thus far. Then, in that split second you could almost see the glimmer in her eyes extinguishing and in it place was an awkward smile coupled with a slightly sympathetic and belittling look. The next few minutes were probably my most awkward minutes of my life. My supervisor tried reallllly hard to explain the evilness and crap you have to take as an academic researcher. She also attempted to glamorize working in the industry and serving as a manufacturing engineer in any field. It was PATHETIC and PLAIN TORTURE, I tell you. A simple “your grades are not good enough” or “you just don’t make the cut” would have been far more merciful and bearable. Save the high and mighty preaching man!

So, move on I did. Next up job hunting! Till date, I have 1 interview which sucked like hell, where I was ‘raped’ for not having enough knowledge on the electrical aspects of products when I applied for the position of Failure Analysis - Microscopy. Which part of that sounds electrical or calculating input output voltages to you? Even more peculiar is that this aspect of Failure Analysis has been conveniently ignored or left out in my 4 years of studies.

And yes, move on again, I did. Am currently mass applying for jobs in a desperate bordering on hysterical bid to get a job interview which could lead to a job offer. But one interesting thing hit me, when some of the companies ask for the ‘expected salary’. Then it got me thinking. How do you know how much are you worth? In fact. How much am I worth to an employer or to anyone for that matter?

Perhaps I am just plain unemployable. Doomed to solitary confinement and leaching of parents’ fund for the rest of my life. Actually, that doesn’t sound half as bad as slogging on 12 hour rotating shifts in manufacturing plants ehy?

Haha. Think I am going mad soon.

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Music : James Morrison – You Give Me Something
Mood: Crappy & Flusy

Need to be VOID

2007-01-30T13:13:00.000+08:00

Shall resolve to work hard
And harder and harder
So hard that i cannot work any harder
Till i morph into a workaholic
Till i morph into something new
Void of names
Void of silly labels
Void of silly thoughts
Void of smiles and frowns
Void of happiness and sorrow
I shall strive to be a machine
Churning
Working
Grinding
Till my last breadth
__________________________________________________________________
Tasks on hand
Tonnes of tutorials
Chinese Orchestra (3 tasks here)
Driving
FYP FYP FYP!!!!!
___________________________________________________________________

Aching

2007-01-29T23:52:00.000+08:00

It hurts
To see
To hear
To know
It also hurts
Not to see
Not to hear
Not to know
It even hurts just to breathe

Perhaps
Its time to go
Silently

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

If you could fly
Am i holding you back?
If you could soar
Am i holding you back?
If you could be free
Am i holding you back?
And if you could be happy
Am i holding you back?

Perhaps its time to go
Silently
Perhaps

Music : Emi Fujita - And I Love You So
Mood : Indescribable

Aucun Titre

2007-01-26T11:53:00.000+08:00

Its all but a façade
A false front
A mask
A lie
The many names of evasion and cowardice
Which incidentally serve to protect oneself
How long can they last?
How long should they last?
Practice escapism
Once in awhile at least
It feels good
So good

Music: Jennifer Paige – Stranded
Mood: Nonchalant

BAD DAY

2007-01-19T00:45:00.000+08:00

Set alarm to wake up at 0845
Woke up at 1145 instead
Rendering me horribly behind schedule for laboratory work
Late for 1st lecture of the day
And had to rush like hell for lecture
Only to realise I brought the wrong set of notes
And to realise I forgot my spectacles & contacts
Spent the bloody lecture half blind and lost
After that, went to lab to do stuff and forgot about time
Next was my only highlight of the day, French,
Late again thanks to lab work
Went through an otherwise fun lesson, half blind
Subsequently went for dinner and bought boiling hot Mian4 Fen2 Guo3
Only to have ½ of the soup spilt onto myself seconds after purchase
Rushed to the toilet to find my enormous tummy turn an angry shade of red
Went back to lab, after dinner, wet, sticky and still burning
Broke two 5ml bottles, and lost a colourless sample to my sneeze
That’s about all.
In probably one of my worst days since the beginning 2007
Wish me luck, so I won’t kill myself with boiling soup next time

Blah.

Music: Some sobby Chinese ballad by Pin Guan
Mood: Like F***

PS: Am supposed to swear less, but man! What a f***ing bad day. I think I deserve 1 cuss or 2.

PANIC Attack

2007-01-12T15:32:00.000+08:00

Had a panic attack barely an hour ago.
And am still reeling from its nauseating effects.
It happened during my Quality Control lecture.
Its basically a course on statistics and sampling.
And on a simpler note, its Math revisited again.
Buried memories of countless nights of futile mugging came back
In the instant the lecturer said " How many of you did not take Statistics before?"
Naturally my hand was up, waving madly
Screaming silently.

Please.
Let me love math
And Statistics.
Bless me with the knowledge, aptitude and luck
All I ask for is 4 months.
Please.

Mood - Panicky like hell
Music : Sarah McLachlan - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

PS: Supposed to be posted on 110107 1510 hrs, but Blogger was either down or school net was down. Moo..

Tis Da Season To Be Jolly?

2006-12-12T01:26:00.000+08:00

Christmas drawing near. Again.
New Year drawing near. Again.
Birthday drawing near. Again.
Nagging feeling of aging. Again.
Ranting. Again.

Fear of uncertainty.
Reminiscing.
Living in the past.
Refusal to move on.
Constant denial.
Again, again, again, again and again…..

When will you finally grow up!

Bitter Sour Old Man Who Dislikes Christmas.

Da Neo
Music : Sarah Maclachlan – Christmas Time Is Here (Feat. Diana Krall)

Proud Finisher

2006-12-06T00:57:00.000+08:00

WOO! Am a proud finisher of the following….

1) 2nd last exams as an undergraduate

This particular stretch of exams has been particularly challenging. In fact, they seem almost as bad as those long forgotten year one days, where everyday seemed like hell and all I felt like doing was dropping out or changing courses. Perhaps, this could be attributed to the very enjoyable 6 month break I had from studies, when I went for the Global Immersion Program in Shanghai. Ah….. How i miss those 6 carefree and almost responsibility free months of enjoyment and traveling.

The difficulty level for this semester was further increased by the ridiculous amount of time and effort I have to put in for my Final Year Project. Bad luck and the existence of some very minority lab mates who are horribly inconsiderate and who sabotage your work either intentionally or unintentionally, only serve to make this semester even tougher.

But well, I survived and finished the semester. Results will be out soon. Am hoping and hoping and hoping…..

2) Standard Chartered Marathon

Yes, This is true. Your bloody freaking lazy fat assed friend here, who is always complaining about thunder thighs and aching knees, completed it. All 42.195km of it. In a horrendously slow watch/clock time of 7 hours, 18 minutes and 34 seconds (Chip time - 7 hours, 12 minutes and 16 seconds). But who cares. I DID IT! WOOOO!!!! Am still feeling the euphoria of this major accomplishment and feat 2 days after the race. Am suitably rewarded with smelly shoes (rain soaked for at least 5 hours), mildly abraded inner thighs, rusty white singlet (due to the rusting of the safety pins holding onto my number tag), huge ugly and loose standard chartered marathon running singlet, a medal, finisher tee (bloody hell, ran out of my sizes, still waiting for it) and most importantly, aching knees, thighs, calves and basically everywhere else. Haha.

To sum up the route was ridiculously long, I ate 2 bananas, 1 Green Apple Flavoured Power Gel (some form of energy and salt boosting supplement) – YUCKSSS, numerous cups of 100 Plus, numerous cups of Ice Mountain mineral water and last but not least quite a few huge wads of HEAT RUB, that is some important shit mind you. :)

Speaking of heat rub, there was this really nice fellow runner who offered his own private tube of Heat Rub to me and Yiing, without us asking for it, at a time when most of the marshallers have ran out of them. That was probably the nicest stranger I have met for quite sometime. Yup! Hope you did fantastically and completed your marathon too!

Finally, I should thank quite a few people. SWMOFF Yiing, Mao, Jeffery, Kelvin and Qi for participating and finishing this incredible event together (more or less la haha), without any one of you, this would not have been possible. Thanks too to all those who came to support and eat with us! Buddie Ning, Bro Yen, Ethnic Angel Angeline and Mao’s Lao Po to be. WEEEEE! Gam Xia, Terimah Kasih, Danke, Arigato, Xie Xie, THANKS!!!!

That’s all for now.

Moo.

Music: Sarah Mclachlan – Wintersong
Mood: Aching but exuberant!

Intruder Alert

2006-11-04T13:55:00.000+08:00

Perhaps I have intruded
By camping over at a room which is not mine
By sleeping on a bed which is not mine
By wearing bathroom slippers which are not mine
By using a computer which is not mine
By signing in on msn using an account which is not mine (accidental)

Music: Emi Fujita – And I Love You So
Mood: Groggy
Location: Hall 15 Computer Room

I Am Altec

2006-10-31T14:38:00.000+08:00

Hi all. My name is Altec Lansing. You can call me Altec. Forgot what is my full name course its too long to remember. My memory is really failing me. Perhaps the stupidity diffused from my idiotic owner who coincidentally has a memory capacity worse than that of a goldfish. Life was good. Or at least from what I can recall. Funnily with my shitty memory, I could still remember the day when I was gloriously ‘chosen’ to be the one. It was on Christmas Eve. There were 2 clowns pacing up down the aisle in my temporary state of residence at Tampines’ Challenger. Then Clown Number 1, my owner picked me up and went to the counter, reaching into his pocket for his wallet to pay for me. However, Clown Number 2 (you know who u are!), intercepted with his orange DBS debit card and graciously signed and paid for me. So much for a ‘surprise’ birthday gift for Clown Number 1? Hahahaha. How blur can he get? Stupid, stupid owner.

The next few days were a blur with me bumping around in the cardboard box with Styrofoam, making me so nauseaous. Bleh! I was placed on a table in a dingy old room, with dusty tables and all. Boy was I happy, finally to be able to breathe fresh air. Although I was occasionally shifted at least twice to 2 other smiliarly dusty places, my lousy owner always bothered to give me some exercise by blasting me up. WOOO! The euphoria rocks, with me gyrating and vibrating to those exciting beats. WOO!

My life took a turn for the bad when one day my owner shelved me. For 6 whole months and flew to Shanghai to have a jolly good time. Curse him! Really cramps my style you know!

Now, I am back on a dusty table, on a cluttered table in some place called Hall 10. BUT I have never felt WORST! I have dust gathering all over me AND its been ages since I got a good workout! Curse my owner’s roomie, who cannot stand music when he is studying AND he is studying ALL THE TIME whenever he is in the room. AND he is ALWAYS IN THE ROOM! Somebody KILL HIM! Or ME! ROAR! I want my life back! I want to feel the high of music and gyrate to the beat! My life SUCKS!

Sob sob…….

Music: Justin Timberlake- SexyBack Feat. Timbaland (On earphones)
Mood of owner : Crazy
My Mood : Crazier

My Heart Works This Way

2006-10-30T01:33:00.000+08:00

Miss (Courtesy of: http://www.dictionary.com/)

1) To fail to hit, reach, catch, meet or otherwise make contact with.
2) To fail to perceive, understand, or experience: completely missed the point of the film.
3) To accomplish, achieve or attain (a goal).
4) To fail to attend or perform: never missed a day of work.
5) To leave out; omit
6) To let go by; let slip: miss a chance
7) To escape or avoid: narrowly missed crashing into a tree
8) To discover the absence or loss of
9) To feel the lack or loss of : Do you miss your family?
________________________________________________________________________

Was commented upon that I do not think, feel, miss enough. Then it dawned on me. How would anyone know I have not been missing/thinking/feeling enough? Unless you have penetrative eyes and X-Ray Vision to see quite a few mm through me, through the skin, flesh, veins, ribs to get through to my heart and analyse what has been going through this pumping piece of flesh.
________________________________________________________________________

Again, Dictionary.com
Feel – to be emotionally affected by

At least to me, feeling and missing could only be experienced and encountered by the individual in question and no one else could get the exact same sensation emanating from the exact same source (your heart). Put it simply, no one will ever get exactly how you feel at any point in time. Well, at least I think my heart works this way. How about yours?

Then it all boils down to self expression and vocalisation of these feelings, these thoughts and these sensations. Perhaps what this cow lacks is the ability to translate these into words. That would have to be learnt. (CHECK!)
It baffles this cow sometimes. How amazingly flawed he is. There seems to be this constant need to adapt, to change, to modify or in other’s perspective “to improve”? Has anyone stopped and observed how naturally beautiful these flaws could be, IF given a chance to flourish and bloom and not be coerced into submission and even disappearance? Perhaps in time to come, this cow may even stop being a cow anymore and lose himself in the endless pursuit to fit in and change. Will there ever be this day where this cow could charge freely at anything and not have to worry about the colour of its spots?

This cow is depressed. This cow needs a break. From reality. From life. From comments, prejudice or even hatred, Look at this cow with love, appreciation and approval, occasionally, or, at least, for today.

Please.

Music: Sarah Mclachlan – Hold On
Hold on.
Hold on to yourself.
This is gonna hurt like hell.

Rain

2006-10-25T23:13:00.000+08:00

It was drizzling
All day or most of it anyway
Ended work early in the lab
But still
Too late to catch the shuttle bus back to my room
Thus, walk I did
To be precise
It was a stroll
A stroll along the dark unsheltered roads to ‘home’
A stroll in the rain
Accompanied only by a constant breeze
Then it came
Gradually
Dripping, gathering, drenching
Before I knew it
I was soaked
Yet strangely
It felt warm
It was warm because I had you

Thinking of you

Music: Faye Wong – 暗涌

Blah

2006-10-19T16:44:00.000+08:00

Bored.

Exhausted.

Physically & mentally.

Staring into space.

Attempting to make sense of everything.

Nothing falls in place.

Nothing at all.

I'm a loser.

Yours Truly,

Moo.

Music: Green Day - Give Me Novacaine

Minority Me

2006-10-16T22:33:00.000+08:00

Its amazing how the simplest events in a day can leave you thinking and go hmmmmm.....

I went over to lab today to work on FYP. I was so engrossed in rushing and completing my work for the day that i did not even noticed when nightfall came. In fact, i needed someone else to ask me along for dinner, did i realised that i have worked around 5 to 6 hours straight.

Well, off i went for dinner with a huge group of people consisting mainly of PHD students who were working late in the lab. It was only halfway through the dinner did i realise that i was actually the minority in the group. Firstly, i was one of the two non PHD students out of a table of 8. Secondly, even more shocking, was that i was probably the only Singaporean at the table! What are the odds of that? In Singapore ok? Mind you!

It also alerted me to another more disturbing phenomenon that are Singaporeans really that inferior? Why are most PHD and other postgraduate posiitons mainly filled up by foreugn students? Or is there something wrong with our eucational environment? Or, does the misconception that all foreigners and foreign stuff are better, still exist?

Interesting huh?

Moo

Music : 梁静茹 - 亲亲
Mood: Bored like crap

Freaky Final Year Full oF Flukes.....

2006-10-14T10:46:00.000+08:00

Currently being trapped in the final year of my study here at wonderfully crazy NTU, it has proven that is more mentally and physically taxing than all my other semesters here in NTU. Balancing FYP and 5 core modules is by no means an easy feat. Since day one 1 returned from China GIP, everyday has been filled with lab work and more LAB. Perhaps i have been slack for too long while i was in China and thus am still experiencing adaptation problems. But then again who isn't adapting all the time? With new challenges everyday round the corner. Its only a game of the survival of the fittest and nothing else. So yup pray that i will survive and emerge stronger. haha!

Also, with graduation day looming and getting closer everyday, the number of Career Fairs targetted towards final year clowns who will join the working society soon are increasingly abundant. It even gives you a false illusion that Singapore is booming and everyone is hiring like mad, BUT, is that true? I wonder what is the real unemployment rate out there. With some friends who graduated last year and till date cannot land a job, it leaves you wondering, how bad or how good is the situation out there. Thinking my own career, which would begin in a few months time, the current state of mind is only confusion and a slight sense of apprehension. I wonder are you guys/gals feeling it too? But then again, it may be me thinking too much once again, its still more than 6 months away from graduation. hahaha!

Am i really busy? Despite the usual and ritual indulgence in mindless online games daily and the occasional trip home to attend to stuff like birthdays and wedding dinners (where attendance is strictly compulsory), it dawned on me that i do not have much of a social life. Have i become a social reject and mindless working machine already? Even before i can be called a full fledged boring engineer? But i wanna stay forever 17, bouncy, youthful and slightly crazy! "VOMITS!"

For all of you out there who feel neglected and unnoticed, well, all i can say is you are not forgotten, its just that bloody moo moo here is bad at time management and is attemtping desperately to balance FYP, final year modules (exams round the corner u know!) , training for Standard Chartered Marathon and maintenance of marginal attendance in Chinese Orchestra. hahaha. Basically summed up its all school, School, SCHOOL! hahahaha! I'll attempt to make it up during the hols (IF i am still not bogged down by FYP GRRR!). Cheers. :)

Work hard yall!
___________________________________________________________________

Interesting Quote which i mean to post long ago, but keep forgetting due to my miniscule memory

Mitch Albom - The Five People You Meet In Heaven "Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know."

My intepretation : Be NICE to everyone. You never know when these so called strangers may be useful or be related or linked to you one day. Stories to share here, relating to my lab mates. But that's another blog for another day.

Moo.

Music: Ken Hirai - Sweet Pillow
Nose: Dripping :(

BACK with no bang whatsoever

2006-10-08T22:44:00.000+08:00

Back on this blog space. I don' know how long i'll sustain this time round. Sometimes it fascinates even myself how amazingly unmotivated in life I can be.

Who am I? (No pun here) Sometimes i really don't know. Is it true that the person who understands you best is seldom yourself? Perhaps and perhaps not. So many questions and so little space for this puny little mind of mine.
___________________________________________________________________

With Tibetian music blaring in my ears, visions and memories of travelling in Tibet and many other parts of China seem like yesterday again. (Despite being back since 5th of August) Its those 13 days in Tibet do i feel most at peace with myself. The tranquility, the scenery, the people, the poverty AND the rich, the culture, the religion, the music and the whole experience of being out there more or less alone. It also taught me something, Loneliness is not that fearful afterall. It may even serve to elevate your mental and spriritual strength in more ways you know. In certain sense, I do miss that sense of loneliness sometimes. Its cleansing. Almost like a quadruple detox. You feel clean after that.
___________________________________________________________________

Me and my ranting. As usual. If you can't make much sense out of what i write, well i don't too. On more than one occasion i have mentioned this, I'm weird and perhaps bordering on eccentric and schizophrenic. Well do pop by to follow through and know this silly cow more.

Moo.

Music : 巴桑 - 天路

Shifting Of Blog Premises

2006-03-02T12:28:00.001+08:00

hey all who are still reading and checking out stuff here.

my blog address has been temporarily shifted to http://dacow.multiply.com

main reason being shanghai network blocks out blogspot and i can onli access it in the office where i steal 10 minutes off me collegue's computer time. Yup. That's it

Till i'm back in Singapore, this place will almost be dead.....

hahaha!

See ya in AUGUST!

MOOO

Da Neo
Music : None
Mood : Bored like crap at work

Checklist for 12 hours to departure

2006-02-08T10:55:00.000+08:00

o Things Done

1. Suitcase packed (20.5 kg only!)
2. Handcarry bag bursting with goodness (Biotherm and all are here. hee hee)
3. Farewell dinners with most friends
4. Ang Pow banked in
5. New currency that i will embrace for the next 6 months or so settled
6. Wanked off, many times in the past few days. WOOPS haha!
7. Cleaned up my room to a reasonable state of untidiness
8. Cleared up the air about my actions with me baby
9. Visited quite a few friends' homes during CNY
10. Be extra nice to parents
11. Be super extra nice to parents
12. Paid all outstanding debts (I HOPE! hee hee)
13. Print out all documents needed
14. Applied for exit permit and notified SAF a few seconds ago
15. Bought a new keychain for new keys (hee hee)
16. Laptop lock and all the crap passwords done

Unfinished business

1. Memoirs of a Geisha book (slightly more than halfway only)
2. Said enough goodbyes to parents
3. Said enough goodbyes to baby
4. Said enough goodbyes to all my pals
5. Dyed my hair (dunno y this came to my mind suddenly haha!)
6. Copy all my songs from my laptop and CDs to my IPOD
7. Lost enough weight (will gain like mad soon, so been trying to negate, but come CNY and spoil all my plans hahahaha!)
8. Wanked enough (OOPS again. But we all know it will NEVER BE ENOUGH! hahahaha!)
9. Desperate housewives season 2. I WANT!
10. Cured my damn flu
11. Pack my laptop. (DUH! of course lo. haha)

That's about all la. And this will probably be my very last entry for the next few months and in case u all forgot course China BLOCKS or FILTERS Blogspot for whatever F*** shit reason also dunno. Maybe too anti- communism? The idea of blogging? Who knows. Will attempt to get meself a new blog address for my stay there. SO, keep staring at me MSN nick ah. hee hee my new address also there lo.

Ciao, Bye bye, 再见, Au revior (watyever la dunno how to spell so dun laff! haha)

Da Neo

Mood : Excited and slightly moody too. haha confusing ah
Music : 周杰倫 - 麥芽糖

杂想 ; Random Thoughts

2006-02-05T01:36:00.000+08:00

To begin, this would be the most disjointed entry in quite awhile, as my mind is in a rather disjointed and scarcely coherent state anyway. One thing to note here too is that this may probably be my last entry here for the next many months, as i heard from my some of my pals that in China, where i would be leaving for really soon, they have censored out blogspots. Will attempt to get a temporary blog address over there if this is proven true.

Chunk 1

Oh well, to begin, Sex and The City Season 6 is rather good and is in fact the best so far of the 6 seasons, have rushed all the way through the 1st five discs and would be down to the last disc tomorrow evening. yup. Loads of emotional meat and not all sex. Slightly more ' real' in a certain manner. Go watch it. You could even skip all 5 seasons and rush to sixth season 1st. For all you know you may like it and want to watch the prior 5 seasons. =p

Chunk 2

The past week or so, has been a big fat mad rush. With the usual Chinese New Year celebrations and visiting and all. On top of that, i am attempting to cramp the meeting up with most if not all of my friends before i leave for Shanghai coming wednesday. Then it suddenly dawned on me. I am missing all of you guys and gals already even before i have flown off and that SUCKS. I blame all of you for that. haha.

Chunk 3

I love my family. Loads and loads of it, despite all the crap that we give one another over the years. I gotta apologise for all the times that i told to myself that 'Why do i have to go through this? Why am in not in another XXXYYY's situation instead? Why?', as i genuinely feel that despite all the flaws and stuff that may seem like flaws, we are almost ...... perfect! haha. Now for some puke inducing declarations ' I love you Ma, Pa and Bro! ' =)

Sometimes, i feel, that most problems at home are usually due to that fact that we are too alike and the fact that we keep our feelings from one another way too darn much. We really should try very hard to listen more and express our feelings more. Perhaps its the typical Asain mindset, but well, that's who we are.

Chunk 4

Probably from the previous few entries it could be observed that i am rather confused and muddled particularly in the emotional aspect of my life. Well, if you ain;t sharp enough to pick it up from those entries, then well, i am here tell you i am. haha. Perhaps i am too wishy washy(po2 po2 ma1 ma1 in Chinese) or perhaps i keep denying myself and keep giving myself excuses as to delay and postpone any actual declarations, but well, it seems that it is all too late now and i can only do anything about it only six months or more later. Seriously, sometimes i wish were more decisive and believe more in myself, that way i would have a far easier life as to less troubling and bad days, at the same time give people around me a far easier time too as they do not have to decipher my actions too much. Just gotta learn the hard way then. Oh well, hope for the best six months later then. =]

That's all the crap i have for now.

Da Neo
Mood: Cranky
Music: Brandy - Never Say Never

Kudos to 'Bystanders'

2006-01-22T02:12:00.000+08:00

Life is fascinating.

There are times when u feel you are postively correct about something and have decided and put your heart out to doing things but time and people around you would tell you and signal to you that you are actually rather deluded and perhaps, even wrong. And, fascinatingly, it is these 'bystanders' who are usually right. Perhaps, there is indeed truth in the saying ' pang2 guan1 zhe3 qing1' or in very rough translation 'bystanders see it all and are far clearer than anyone in the situation itself.

There are times when your heart is sure, but your actions say otherwise and it is once again 'bystanders' who tell you that you are actually contradicting yourself. And, again, fascinatingly, you may not even know so all this while.

There are times when you are confused and caught in murky water so damn deep that your head is almost under and drowning, it is these 'bystanders' whom give you a helping hand, reaching for you when you are down and out and when all hopes seem dashed and rescues you from disappearing into oblivion.

There are times when you are so want something so bad, but am constantly plauged by low self esteem and severe lack of confidence and it is these 'bystanders' who come your way, lifting you up, helping you on your way to success in all areas of your life.

I'm fucked up. I know it. But, I'm blessed with a wonderful bunch of 'bystanders' or friends who do care. Thanks for all the help i had and will need in time to come.

As an oscar winner on the pedestal would say, " I, would have never done it without you. Thank you for your support....."

Da Neo
Mood - Troubled
Music - None

Flight Of The COW

2006-01-18T08:12:00.000+08:00

Just realised have not been blogging much these days. Perhaps it is due to the boredom and monotony of prolonged holidays. hahaha.

I promise to blog more when i'm away, as there probably would be so much more to say every day.

Da flight to China has been confirmed. I would be leaving on the 9th of Februrary 2006. 0740 a.m is the flight, flight number, SQ 826. Yup, that would be it. Oh and, by this entry i would still say that there is no need to come send me off as it is too early, go attend your lessons and go work or whatever crap you are doing. No worries as DA COW would be back. wahahahahahaha!

More admin and slacking lies ahead in the day for me.

Moo.....

Da Neo
Mood : Strangely, nonchanlant despite having so much 'undone' stuff
Music : Strangely, none.
Current obssession : www.maplesea.com
___________________________________________________________________

Just recieved a phone call from the air agency. My flight has been brought forward to 0115 hrs 9th of feb. SQ still. Yup.

Moo.....

Standing Tall

2005-12-24T00:34:00.000+08:00

There are many firsts in one's lifetime. Be it the first time you walk, the first time you spoke or the first time you fell in love. All these experiences are part and parcel of growing up and experiencing life.

Today's another first for me too. Writing blog in the first hour of my birthday. The experience is really..... new or different. It made me think of my past, present and future. Particularly events in the past. Looking back, i realised how much shit had happened and how many obstacles and crises i have been through. There have been near death experiences, heartbreak, conscription, studies, humilation and assholes who seem to exist only to make your life much harder that it already is. Looking back, i marvel at being able to survive through it all. For this, i stand tall and very proud.

It is on this day, which happens to be Christmas Eve too (nope, i am not a catholic) that i wish for better days in the years ahead for me and for all of you friends out there. May all our crap and assholes be erased from our lives and that we begin on clean sheet starting from today. May this clean sheet serve as a drawing block which would only capture the most beautiful and happiest moments of your life and would protect and preserve these wonderful memories.

Stay happy and Merry Chirstmas to all! Let's show them all that we can celebrate this holiday too when it is hot, humid and rainy instead of cold, white and snowy.

Da Neo
Music : None (Surprsingly ah)
Mood : Pleasant

Shanghai Knight Wannabe

2005-12-15T16:18:00.000+08:00

For those who have been reading my blog, you should know that i would be leaving for China for my Industrial Attachment for the third year of my studies. Well, today, i finally got accepted by my 1st choice of company, which is Vetco Gray Petroleum Equipment (Shanghai) Co., Ltd in Shanghai. I would have to reach Pudong Airport on the 7th of Februrary between 0600hrs to 0630hrs. That is all the details i have now. And YES, i still don't know what is my attire and pay for work, so quit asking me that. hahahahaha!

Also, today, i blew a bomb SGD 300 to be exact on a set of wollen thermal underwear (made in England) and a grey wollen pullover. Thanks to a previous trip to China just before my enlistment into the army in 2001, i own a supposedly very good down jacket and a few pairs of wool socks. Hope this would suffice for now. hahaha. I have pity for those who reside in countries with the four seasons and constantly have to blow loads of money on seasonal clothing. hahaha.

Well, what i am lacking now would be a Hugo Boss or CK trench coat and the right attitude to pose like a underground gang leader on the Shanghai "tan" to mimic the very old and very laughable chinese movies in the past. hahaha.

Oh well enough of crap. Will provide more details once i have them.

Ciao.

Da Neo
Mood - Delirious
Music : 911 - How Do You Want Me To Love You (1st time hearing it, not bad :)

Da Neo - Hung UP

2005-12-10T15:58:00.000+08:00

Madonna - Hung Up lyrics

Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Time goes by so slowly for those who wait
No time to hesitate
Those who run seem to have all the fun
I'm caught up
I don't know what to do

Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
I don't know what to do

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you

Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Ring ring ring goes the telephone
The lights are on but there's no-one home
Tick tick tock it's a quarter to two
And I'm done
I'm hanging up on you

I can't keep on waiting for you
I know that you're still hesitating
Don't cry for me 'cause
I'll find my way
you'll wake up one day
but it'll be too late

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you
___________________________________________________________________

Absolutely addictive song. Gets me grooving. Its the 7th time playing on my laptop now. hahahaha. This is all i have to say for now. Go listen to it. Hate the video though. Yucky. 1 word. Thunder-sixties-boxer thighs. ERKS. (more like 4-5 words... hahahaha)

Another very nice album is Enya's Amarantine album. 1) NO! Its not a christmas album despite the red and white christmasy looking cover. 2) Most Lyrics are untypable, they are in Loxian Language (No i did not mispell it) 3) FANTASTIC to read study and sleep to. :)

Just realised something, have actually spent quite a bit on my Chinese New Year Clothes budget on these 2 cds. My Goodness i betta STOP!

Till then, Everything little thing that you say or do..... lalala.....

Da Neo
Music: Madonna - Hung Up

The Pianist - Piano-ing Out

2005-11-21T03:59:00.000+08:00

Just read the lamest article in the latest Sunday Times today, particularly pages 8-9 of the news section and NO by news I am not referring to the LIFE section.

Well, the article title says it all, “Pianist NS dues – 28 years later”. Its about this pianist M Tan who defaulted on his NS duties 28 years ago, by running off to some part of England and to study at the Royal College Of Music (yaya, its supposed to be damn prestigious). In rough hokkien terms, he “zhao2 lor3” or “ran away” when it was his turn to “serve the nation’.

28 years later (which is this year), he decides to return to our little red dot to see his mother, ‘reconnect with the local music scene’ and judge the biennial National Piano and Violin competition. Naturally, he would be stopped at the customs and served a letter to attend a court hearing on his offences and naturally, serve any punishments that our government has to dish out to him as he still refuses to give up his Singaporean nationality either for pride, honour, glory, patriotism or just plain convenience. This, we will never know. All citizens and in fact many non-citizens who know the tough stance that the government has taken on the conscription policy here and would definitely feel that he “hong4 gan3 liao” (hokkien term for dead meat, although literal translation means sodomisation). But guess what? The term of the punishments is only a BLOODY FINE of SGD$5000! THIS IS PEANUTS to most, if not all social classes here. To our supposedly WORLD FAMOUS PIANIST, this would probably translate to PEANUT SHELLS? or even lower, PHELGEM (from eating too many peanuts). BLOODY LAME! LAME CHICKEN SHIT! (Do note I had to curb a severe temptation to showcase my wonderful Hokkien vocabulary of Famous and Not-So-Famous Vulgarities).

2.5 years was how long we had to serve. (Currently, the conscription term is reduced 2 years). 5000 dollars for 2.5 years of my life, which are not entirely wasted, but not entirely productive either. Even working as a toilet cleaner who earns around 500-700 dollars can pay off that amount in less than 10 months. SERIOUSLY, what the F*** is this man? On one hand, there are people high up there in the political ladder constantly humming the importance of national service, national duties and military defense and here you are letting someone who went AWOL for 28 years to just get off the hook by paying 5k? WHAT the F*** again for those who have to serve detention barracks for going missing for a few hours when in service or for lamer things like repeated offences of smoking in non-yellow boxes and 5k for 28 years? This would also indirectly saying that its OKAY to run off to any other country to escape from this dreaded 2 years of your manly years, provided YOU RUN OFF LONG ENOUGH, don’t let me catch you after anywhere less than 20 years after you have ran off! FUNKY LOGIC ah?

There will definitely be some of you that claim that he is afterall some world renowned pianist with international recognition and has contributed to the Singapore in his own ways. Seriously, as a typical army specialist would say, WAKE UP YER BLOODY IDEA F***ING RECURIT! By making yet another lamer comment like that, it is equivalent to diminishing the contributions of far greater people who have served their term of conscriptions. What constitutes a “good enough” contribution to Singapore so that you are immune from serving the conscription term? Do seemingly lesser jobs like toilet cleaning and road sweeping not count towards as contributing to the country? Here is one suggestion then, every guy turning 18, prepare 5 thousand dollars, run off to some god knows where place and don’t come back until you have called back here and gained sufficient political clout or “satisfactory contributions”. If you don’t get that kind of “recognition” don’t ever come back! Simple? Afterall, its only 5k worth of peanuts, how hard is that?

For goodness sake, the conscription system is bad enough with so many bloody white horses galloping around. By white horses here we are referring to people who once again are seemingly large “contributors” to the nation and can take on slacker roles in the armed forces like clerks, which are usually reserved for people who are injured or have innate health problems. One wonderful example and personal experience of mine was during my Basic Military Training recourse or BMT ACT 2 for short. (I suffered a skull fracture in my ACT 1, went on MC and had to re-do it. SEE! FOR NORMAL people with “lesser contributions” WE WILL NEVER LET U OFF!) During that BMT ACT 2, I was surrounded by people with various forms of injury sustained during the army, fractured shoulders, knees, ankles, heart problems etc. One particular and very spectacular and even glowing example of white horse was a NATIONAL TEAM SWIMMER by the name of M C*h*a*y was there too! He was excused from every bloody thing and interestingly, even SWIMMING! HOW FUNKY IS THAT? On one hand you are arresting people for chao4 geng1 (pretence or faking of injury or sickness to avoid training) and on another hand you are handing out official SLACK slips to people who are so fit they will put your PE teacher to shame. LAME once again.

To end off this long and very LAME entry, I would say that this is the real reason for the declining standards of soldiers here. The HUGE problem of double standards is ridiculous. Just remember one thing from here, political clout or “contributions” can get you a long way or get you YOUR WAY. Its time to start teaching all your sons and younger brothers the official way to chao4 geng1 properly, ie. Pick up PIANO and prepare 5K to escape conscription. Sounds good eh?

PISS OFF F***ers!

Da Neo - Lamed
Music : Faye Wong - 暗湧

Life : Everthing but Good

2005-11-17T10:19:00.001+08:00

被爱的女人

在镜子前面
我是个被爱的女人
他就在门外
这个周末我可以依赖在他的胸怀

在情人面前
我还是单身的女人
爱若缺了缘分
我想我只能用情至深但不能太认真

为什么被爱有时却觉得悲哀
为什么我还是害怕一个人醒来
为什么相爱日子却仍然空白
为什么你走不到我的未来

让爱固定下来
我不会永远青春可爱
我的美丽要你的温柔
帮我保留下来
让受固定下来
我和你不要不要分开
我不要爱一再一再彩排
我不是每次失恋后
都能重新再来

Very sad lyrics for those who understand, particularly the following few lines. Below is an attempted translation, which obviously is rather rough and overall not very good. Lah! (See my engrish sucks ...)

为什么被爱有时却觉得悲哀
Why do I feel sad when I am in love?
为什么我还是害怕一个人醒来
Why do I feel afraid when I wake up alone?
为什么相爱日子却仍然空白
Why do you love and still feel so empty?
为什么你走不到我的未来
Why can’t I see you in my future?

How often do you feel this way about your relationships with anybody? (Not necessarily have to be romantic relationships. )

How often do you feel that you know the person enough and you are always shocked somehow, someday?(both positively and negatively)

How often do you feel that you hope for so much and live in your preconceived and idealized wonderland where everything is perfect and out of no where, that unforeseen BOMB appears and rips you to bits?

How often does anticipation and regard lead to disappointment and disgust?

How often you wake up from your dreams in tears and you have absolutely no idea why?

How often do you wake up and feel like screaming but nothing comes out of your dry scratchy throat?

How often do feel you don’t know a person at all despite sharing a portion of your life (maybe a huge portion of your life) for a large part of your living years?

How often do you not see a person in your future?

How often do you sit there, alone, thinking and wondering, where do we go from here and how are you going to resolve this shit when it is something that you absolutely have no control over?

How often do you have to resolve issues that are seemingly absolutely none of your business and yet you know you HAVE to stir the smelly shit and breathe the pungent aroma at the same time knowing you have to wonderously change shit into gold?

Ever heard of the Chinese saying? 纸是包不住火? Or, “paper can never contain a burning flame”.

How often do you understand this and yet you sincerely hope that you can be the paper that never burns and hold on, contain, shield and protect despite the scalding tongues constantly licking at you, all over?

Lost, misguided and drained.

This cow may never walk home.

Da Neo – Pensive
Music : 潘嘉丽 - 被爱的女人

2005-11-09T06:03:00.000+08:00

Alanis Morissette - Ironic

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think

It's like rain on your wedding dayI
t's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic... dontcha think I

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face

A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreamsAnd then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
A little too ironic...and yeah I really do think...

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out
___________________________________________________________________

Its like mugging
for 14 days straight and
F***ing up your paper

Its like liking a song
when u had it for 48 months
and u only start listening it today

Its like rain while hanging out your laundry

Its like finishing your rice
and finding a fly
stuck to the bottom of the f***ing plate

Its like typing a lame blog article
on your exam day

And isn't it ironic... dontcha think

Da Neo
Mood - Cranky
Music - Alanis Morissette - Ironic (Acoustic) ---> (DUH! What else?)

OH My GOD!!!!!!!

2005-11-04T04:55:00.000+08:00

Am recently cursed.
Truly!
Not kidding
Shall list the spectacular events one by one...

1) Sprained my ankle (1st in my life) - Monday 2 weeks ago (Still aching now)
2) Phone broke down - Monday 1 week ago
3) Burner broke down - Wednesday 1 week ago (Pending repair)
4) Phone broke down again - Friday 1 week ago (Finally fixed)
5) IPOD detected by windows but not ITUNES!!!!! - NOW and pending resolution

KNNBCCB

WHEN WILL THIS F***ING END?

Da Neo
Mood - Pissed! DAMN PISSED!
Music : 石欣卉 - 不要说抱歉
___________________________________________________________________

ipod + itunes prob fixed.

Software and a lot of settings problems. Wondered how they arose when they seemed to be working fine just a few days ago.

Well, i realised i may have over-reacted.

But,
Music = my life
IPOD = music
U probably see the link now.
Forgive your drama king here.
Shall not need to be killed today.
Thanks yall who participated in one way or another in this minor afternoon drama.

~Peace~

Da Neo
Mood - Relieved
Music : The Corrs - Spancil Hill
Time : 1422 (as we all see, its a short 2.5 hour movie directed and starred by yours truly and da ipod, lets keep it that way and NO SEQUELS PLEASE!)

U GOT MAIL ..... : )

2005-10-28T08:17:00.001+08:00

27 October 2005

Dear DA NEO,

Congratulations!

I am pleased to inform you that the NTU Bursaries / Loans Selection Committee has approved your application with regards to the Ng Bok Eng Scholarship for your participation in the Global Immersion Programme (GIP).

I wish to reiterate that the scholarship is awarded to you on the following conditions:

1) If you withdraw from NTU during the period or on completion of the GIP, you will have to refund NTU the scholarship awarded.
2) You are not in receipt of any other scholarship during the duration of the GIP.

I will arrange with the Office of Finance to disburse the amount to you via the bank account that you have with NTU.

I wish you an enriching and rewarding overseas experience.

Yours sincerely,

Chairman, NTU Bursaries / Loans Selection Committee

Update On My Life

2005-10-20T13:06:00.000+08:00

Life is boring and monotonous. It all could be summed up in the following few categories, school, health, miscellaneous.

School

Boring. Dateline, datelines, or more like DEADLINES. This semester in my 3rd year of study has proven to be the semester with the most number of projects. Shall attempt to list all of them below. They will sound boring, so to all who are not bored yet, read on! Haha!

MS 3002
Simulation writeup on the doping procedures of silicon wafers – 8 pages

Basically, as the title sounds, its boring and a lot to do with electronics and stuff, which, incidentally is my most hated subject. I even submitted a wrong copy for this dreaded assignment. Have emailed the Professor with the appropriate copy, hope he accepts it. --- Fingers crossed

MS 3003
1) Corrosion report on any corrosion phenomenon you observe around you – 10 pages
2) A journal review on any aspect of material failure (except corrosion) – 10 pages

As seen from the project title, this course is all about materials failure and its phenomenon. Fun to read on its own but HORRENDOUS to research and write about it, as the project titles are damn vague. As for the part 2 report, the asshole tutor refused to give any tutorial and instead conveniently replaced that with this lame report. LAZY ASS! How the hell do you propose we pass the damn exams with no tutorials and no past year papers to refer to?

MS 3005
1) Improvements on the current design and materials of the tennis racquet – 60+ pages + formal presentation (rumoured to be 40% of module)
2) Improvements on the current design of the CD case – 5 pages + informal presentation

Longest and biggest project of the semester. Lasted us the whole semester till last week. I am blessed with a leader who does not believe in discussions and general consensus. Particularly strong headed and refuses to accept any suggestions even though he is outrightly wrong. Bloody hell! Well, that was solved by highly secretive conferences between the remaining four members (including me). Thankfully the tennis racquet project turned out to be damn impressing which was supplemented by a bloody good presentation. CD case wise, one word lame. The tutor was so slack that he hardly bothered with listening to our presentations and explanation of the proposed designs and was constantly hurrying the class to speed up. In the end, I decided to do a very informal presentation and got the class to be laughing most of the time. THAT WORKED for us, somehow, so much so he emailed all of us, saying it was a good presentation, as for our slides and asked for photos of our prototype. Haha. Hope that meant well though. Else it would only be my self-inflated ego that feels good.

MS 3030
Writeup on a leader, be it past or present and apply the leadership principles you have learnt and analyse whether he/she would be successful in the present day situation.

Uneventful. But quite a number sleeping members and I ended having to do most if not all of the second part of the project alone. All they did was EDIT format and English. SUCKS. But due to much smaller scale of project and from the experience from the tennis racquet project, don’t have much to bitch here. Have already resigned to the fate of shitty groups. Wondering is it me who complain too much or am I too unlucky. Haix.

HE207
Money and banking project writeup on the influences of China on the Singaporean economy – 6 pages

In this project got to work with 2 business students, ladies to be exact. I also leant 2 things, number 1, ladies can have much worse handwritings than guys (including my chicken scratch handwriting. Hahahaha!). Number 2, not all business students have good English. This statement is made knowing that my English is not very good either. But, scenario was that one of the members insisted on replacing the possibility of finding a job with FEASIBILITY of getting a job. How CHINA-FIED is that? (ke3 neng2 xing4) MY GOD. But after much persuasion and coaxing I finally got my way of changing the sentence to a safe and very boring “ whether he can get a job”. GRRR. But on the nice side, they had good grasp of economics and were rather friendly.

Well, as you can see, with all these projects, my life consists of little of nothing else. Shall attempt a rundown again, so can save you all from sleeping halfway through my article. Hahahaha! Basically health and miscellaneous are all here. Haha. Lazy to put as main point la. :P

1) Sprained my ankle while smsing and walking down the stairs. My First in my life! Still in bandages now. Hahahahaha! Sucks. Hard to study, walk, shit, shower and basically everything also.
2) Emcee for yet another cousin’s wedding. Which I feel I under-performed seriously. Hahaha. But then again, it was so last minute. But the wedding was beautiful, everything was almost perfect. 20 tables, small and intimate. Its also one of the few times in my life where I feel lonely other than the dreaded Valentine’s day in feb. hahahaha! (All go awwwww……. Thank you! :P)
3) CO or Chinese orchestra. The usual fare. Miss being in the committee. Miss the shit. Hahahaha. Thankful for the gatherings we have manx!
4) NELLERS, or the NEL gang or the North East Line Gang. We should meet up even more manx!
5) K. Must take care! Smile more! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
6) “Baby baby don’t fall asleep……” Hahaha! :P Someday really must come up with the tune. Hahaha!
7) Study for exam – 1% completed onli. PANIC!

Well, I have updated enough for today. Feel free to read my blog as often as you want or as little as you want. Whoever feels offended from this entry, that means you are not meant to read my blog. Too bad you found it! Hahahahahaha

Da Neo
Music - 潘嘉丽 - 被爱的女人 (Tentatively on Infinite Loop)
PS: Send me all her songs lah! Friendly lei! Hahahaha!

Thoughts

2005-09-09T13:14:00.000+08:00

To look but not see
To eat but not taste
To hear but not listen
To touch but not feel
To adore pine and yearn
But not profess and divulge
Cowardly me

Da Neo
(...)
Music : Dave Koz - First Love (Looping for 20th time)

Land Of Dragons and Great Walls

2005-09-08T01:26:00.000+08:00

Well, finally some good news in this down and out blog of mine. Earlier this semester i applied for the Global Immersion Programme provided by the University, under which i would be able to do my Industrial Attachment. Subsequently i was called up for an interview and seem to impress them enough such that the endorsed my application and if nothing else goes wrong i would be in China, the Land of Dragons and Great Walls, working for 4 days and studying at a local University for 1.5 days. However, i have been informed that the pay may suck, which to me does not matter as fortunately, my parents are willing and able to settle any extra spending i may incur during my stay there.

However, i must not deny the fact that i will miss all of you out here. I will miss CO too. But it is hard enough for me to make this decision of going already. So all, please be kind and spare me all the talk of "Can u don't go? etc etc.". It will only make it harder and worse for me. :P

Hahaha. that seemed like some heavy talk, but still, its rather good news for me and the thing is like another 3 or 4 months away. Let's meet up more and have more fun! : )

Da Neo
(Drained of blood from donation)
Music : Hoobastank - Out Of Control

PS: Thank you NELLERS for choosing the pink polo tee i wore to the interview. It probably brought me the good luck! hee hee! : )

Scary Calls

2005-08-25T14:18:00.000+08:00

What qualifies as a scary call?

I'm sure all of us have various interpretations for "scary calls" here, be it phantom voices, unknown strangers, "Tai Yee Long" (a.k.a loansharks), scorned lovers, parents, principal, teachers, chairman or boss or company, supervisor, ......., insurance agents, financial advisers, Insurance Agents, Financial Advisers, ..... INSURANCE AGENTS, FINANCIAL ADVISERS.

NO prizes for those who managed to guess what calls i just got.

Answer the following....

Insurance agents = Financial advisers ?
a) True
b) Yea
c) Non False
d) Should be la

In the most common of terms and those who do not have a four or three year business degree, would probably agree with me. They will usually be your friends whom you have known for quite sometime and may or may not be close. They will call you out of no where one day on the pretext of asking how are you are you busy? Once you say NO, the trap is sprung and they will launch into a very well rehearsed monologue of listening to their long term short term medium term, don't know what else term plans and consider proetcting yourself against 1001 or more diseases and death and still miraculously earn some money after signing a plan of 25 years or more years.

For starters, i have nothing against this field as a career, but however, i feel, they should adpot a selective method towards enlisting friends as their potential clients. Most students have no money to plan, even if they do, most have some form of plans already undertaken by their parents, so wait till they start working first then attack, higher chances of getting them and better commission ma. Another thing, is when people say they are not comfortable to see you or not interested to go at all, they MEAN IT and are trying to be nice and remain friends, so stop pestering them and you can save a lot of time and money and go find another target ma, don't force people or potential clients to say "Stop calling me!" or "F*** Off!" or "Go Away!" or something to that extent. Most of us still wanna retain the friendship but CURRENTLY still don't wanna be your client and may even actually CONSIDER to be clients in the FUTURE you see?

Haix. i really should learn how to handle this kind of calls. For all those who have experience feel free to share your skills and tactics on getting out of smiliar and very sticky situations. Comments are very appreciated. Sorry to friends who call me before reagarding this and are currently reading this. But this is how i feel, so excuse me for being frank. :P

Da Neo
Music : Faye Wong - 掃興
(No Mood To Study Still :()

Another Bo Liao Quizz :P

2005-08-23T13:24:00.000+08:00

You scored as Posion. Your death will be by poison, probably because you are a glutton and are around so many people that it would be easy to get away with it. Several important people in history share your fate.

Suicide

67%

Posion

67%

Bomb

60%

Eaten

60%

Accident

53%

Stabbed

53%

Disease

53%

Cut Throat

47%

Disappear

47%

Natural Causes

47%

Suffocated

47%

Drowning

40%

Gunshot

40%

How Will You Die??
created with QuizFarm.com

Friends

2005-08-11T09:29:00.000+08:00

Friends

Are people who are there for you when u need them

Are people who are there for you even when u don’t need them

Are people who u feel emotionally attached to

Are people who u will share your sadness and happiness with

Are people who will share their sadness and happiness with u

Are people whom you call names and poke fun at

Are people whom you share certain common interests with

But, Are Friends

Permanent shelters or fleeting bus-tops in your life?

People who come to you course there is some form of benefits for both parties?

Soul mates or slaves of one another?

.

Those were thoughts accumulated over a long period. They were originally in Chinese initially and had a hard time putting it down in English. Hope it is understandable. Also, it is not meant to offend or rebut any of the friendships that we all share. Its just mindless Da Neo ranting and thinking again.

Da Neo
(Flusy and thinking a lot)
Music : Emma Bunton - Tomorrow

Loneliness

2005-08-05T14:19:00.000+08:00

When was the last time when u were in a very crowded room and you know no one else?

When was the last time when u were in a very crowded room at a freezing temperature and yet u felt stuffy and warm?

When was the last time when u were in a very crowded room with loads of noise and u are sitting alone in a corner?

When was the last time when u were in a very crowded room and u felt like screaming?

When was the last time when u were in a very crowded room and yet u felt extremely lonely?

When was the last time when u sat alone in a room facing nothing but the four walls and feel them caving in on u?

When was the last time when u know you have loads of work to do but still dwell on seemingly less important stuff?

When was the last time when u started reflected on your friendships and life and start regretting all your recent bigger decisions and feel you have screwed up?

When was the last time when u listened to Enya or any other slow airy fairy music which sounds like nothingness and wrote an article full of questions?

For me, its an hour ago and the feeling is still here.

Clinging
Crushing
Consuming
Not letting go.

Da Neo
(Lonely)

Music : Enya – Athair Ar Neamh

6 Letter Curse

2005-07-16T01:55:00.000+08:00

In the past month or so, i recieved news of two people being dumped with the 6 letter curse. This word usually revolves around white gowns and antiseptic rooms and is a close friend with another 5 letter word that we all dread.

Well, its CANCER and DEATH that i am referring to here.

First brush with it this month, was the mom of a very dear friend of mine from army and NTU. Throat cancer was her poison. After a very long op to remove the damn mutated piece of flesh, she's currently recuperating at home undergoing chemotherapy at the same time.

Second encounter involved an msn chat an hour or so ago. A very close pal from army who is doing his degree in NUS was diagnosed with Hepatitis B and liver cancer. He would be undergoing an op on coming wednesday to get rid of the "Thing" that does not belong there and hopefully no chemotherapy needed.

This reminded me of an article i read sometime back. By 20** (can't remember exactly the year) every 1 in 2 persons would be affected by some form of cancer, put another way, approximately half the population would be affected by the problem of mutation of cells. What have we done wrong to create such a situation? Is it the diet? The environment? Or the devices we use? A long list of words come to my mind, radiation, carcinogents (hope i got the spelling right) etc etc.

Depressing day. Depressing news. Depressing shit.

Plain Depressing!

But keep it up people and stay very positive as you all are now. Family members keep it up too! Your support is far more than just important. Sorry to all for having to endure this shitty entry and hope i have not killed your day by making you think about life death and mutated cells too, as i forsee i will be doing so for the rest of the week or so. :(

Well gotta go nurse my throbbing headache that does not seem to go away despite downing 2 panadols.

Take care. All of you.

Da Neo

1900-KISS-MY-ASS

2005-07-14T00:53:00.000+08:00

How many times a year do you see tv shows asking for your money in the name of charity? For an extremely gross underestimate, 5 every year? For the feeble minded, i shall attempt to REFRESH your memory. (NKF, Cancer Foundation, Pocket Money Fund, Some Buddhist monk thing always on Channel U, Community Chest etc etc) How many times have your dialled in total those hotlines 1900- *** - **** donating SGD $ 5.20, $10.20, $50.20? Do note that wayyyyy back we had $2.20 donations, which have been suspiciously removed. Is $2.20 TOO CHEAP for any of those donations, or too cumbersome an amount to tally for the total amount during the 2 hour celebrity fisaco on TV? Also, what is it with the $0.20 surcharge when people dial in to support your charity? Phone line operations charges? Please man, please. If you have stayed in Sinagpore long enough you would understand that for a call that is under a min with Zoe Tay, Fann Wong or Tay Ping Hui whispering to you in the most seductive voice "Thanks for your call, do make another to save the lives of many." would not cost you that much even u use a coin or card operated pay phone. Ok let's make the ridiculous assumption that playing a pre-recorded message and clocking a counter to charge you for your donation takes 20 cents of effort, why are we still charge again for the call in our monthly phone bills? Double accounting is supposedly wrong and would cost you marks in accounting and economics modules at undergraduate level, i'm sure many graduates and post graduates at the phone companies can figure that out too!

Recently, NKF's CEO was served with a lawsuit for embezzlement, decieving the public and misuse of funds (are'nt they the same? hmm, my english is bad, forgive me) In the past many kidney failure patients were morphined to death on the pretext that NKF does not have enough funds to help cover their medical bills, today we are constantly reminded or brain-washed that they have a healthy 3 year reserve to help the patients. However the truth is the reserves of $220 million could actually last 30 years even if everyone stopped donating towards the supposedly 2000 patients it had (unlike the NKF-proclaimed amount of 3000 patients). This the CEO (A Mr T.T Durai) claimed that he ' wanted to raise as much money for patients future' and 'Error in figures are not so MATERIAL ..' What the hell does material mean to u? At least when donating we deserve to know how much you have already have before deciding whether or not to 'help' the celebrities in acheiving the ever increasing and ever unrealistic 'targetted number of calls'. According to Mr Durai also, he did not intend to decieve the public. This is paramount to saying, "Oh! you are dead, but, i did not intend to stab you with the knife 1000 times on the same spot, which also happens to be where the heart or kidney is located. " Well, ok, perhaps i have been ignoring the 'big picture' of helping people, i am so sorry for that. Then i would love to see whoever can explain the $900 gold taps, the $1200 toilet bowls, in the office and the 8 cars and dirivers that our Mr Durai has at his disposal to go ANYWHERE, not forgetting NKF is also paying the road tax, maintenance and repairs of his private Mercedes Benz. Lastly, lets hear what NKF's fervent supporter, our former PM's wife Mrs Goh Chok Tong has to say about this " For a person who runs a million-dollar charitable organisation, $600,000 is PEANUTS as it has a few hundred millions in reserves. " Well, $600,000 is the amount Mr Durai recieves as official pay annually, that tranlastes to roughly $50,000 a month. Hmm, since when is $50,000 a month peanuts? How many donors who contribute towards the fund actually earn 10 times less of wat he earns annually? And THANK YOU Mrs Goh, now we do know somehow you are bloody rich TOO (i'm not hinting at anything here really NOT!), but please, not all healthy non-kidney patients do make anywhere near that amount too. If this statement was supposed to help Mr Durai, i think you have just done the opposite of kicking him in the face and sending him further down the drain. Good work Mrs Goh! However, let's not be too quick to shout GUILTY, with powerful and very very rich Mrs Goh and probably many other POWERFUL people, Mr Durai will probably get off the hook. Enjoy reading the drama in the papers at least for the next few weeks.

To all, for goodness sake, stop calling from today onwards, wait for 25 years (By then they will ONLY have 5 years reserves left. So sad. SO LOW! HELP THEM!) then you can start helping NKF prevent people from getting morphioned to death again. For those who are too rich can call me to donate to me. Don't be too quick to call me a heartless bastard who does not contribute to the society and less fortunate, well, at least i have community chest automaticaly taking out a few dollars out of my bank account every month and i have also made some very disillusioned calls towards NKF too. Take my advice spend the money elsewhere or save up and buy yourself an IPOD, its really good.

Da Neo
Mood : Pissed
Music : Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc on MTV

Religion Quiz

2005-06-17T22:00:00.000+08:00

Stumbled upon this.

Am currently a free-thinker, this quizz has proven otherwise or is trying to tell me i should not remain a free thinker.

The site is http://quizfarm.com/middle.php, visit u may be surprised. :)

The following are the results
__________________________________________________________________

You scored as Buddhism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Buddhism. Do more research on Buddhism and possibly consider becoming Buddhist, if you are not already.
In Buddhism, there are Four Noble Truths: (1) Life is suffering. (2) All suffering is caused by ignorance of the nature of reality and the craving, attachment, and grasping that result from such ignorance. (3) Suffering can be ended by overcoming ignorance and attachment. (4) The path to the suppression of suffering is the Noble Eightfold Path, which consists of right views, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right-mindedness, and right contemplation. These eight are usually divided into three categories that base the Buddhist faith: morality, wisdom, and samadhi, or concentration. In Buddhism, there is no hierarchy, nor caste system; the Buddha taught that one's spiritual worth is not based on birth.

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

Buddhism

71%

agnosticism

67%

Paganism

63%

Satanism

58%

Christianity

54%

Judaism

50%

Islam

50%

atheism

50%

Hinduism

46%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

F***ing Shithead

2005-06-14T10:08:00.000+08:00

Yesterday i got a very strange call. Below is an attempted renactment.

Caller : Hello may i speak to HANYI pls?

Me : Err.... yes speaking.

Caller : Is this HANYI?

Me : Not Really. Its Haoyi here.

Caller : Oh sorry, i'm calling from Peter & **** (Can't realli remember) company and we got your details from our partner (in crime? lol) and would like to offer you the position of management trainee in our company.

Me : OH! errrr....

Caller : You are currently still schooling right? In NTU as an engineering student from year 2 going to year 3 right? Soon to do your IA?

Me : Errrr... yea, in 2 semesters time.

Caller : Our manager would like to invite you for an interview.....

Me : (Adruptly cuts in) Sorry, but i am not very keen in getting into the erm... financial or management field

Caller : Oh err... Don't worry we constantly hire engineers in our company too, my manager is going on a business trip and would only be back on the 22nd of this month and could hold an interview on the 26th 11 a.m, can you make it on that time?

Me : Err... yes, but i'll have to re.... (consider was cut off)

Caller : (Adruptly cuts in) ok so great! do u have a piece of paper and pen? our address is Blah Blah Blah Orchard towers, i am Linda and call me when u get here, due to security reasons i'll have to escort you up, kindly send your resume with your photo to the email address blahblah@blahblah.com.

Me : Errr...

Caller : Oh and my moblie is 9******* in case u cant reach me on the office phone which is 6******.

Me : Errr..... i'll be considering first and get back to you on another day.

Caller : ok thank you.

ME => Hangs up phone and almost immediately ACCIDENTALLY deleted the details of the company which i typed in a word file. Also, don't ask me why do i have to set my recycle bin to auto flush for every file. T_T AND NOW i cannot even reject them course i forgot all the details and my the company's stupid number is a private number which refuses to show up on my handphone.

F***ing Shithead, whose going to stand up a manager and refuse to correspond to emails and whom is patiently waiting for the Ms Linda to call again, so i can attempt to reject her interview request again. (Though this may all be a hoax to con me into getting into some illegal pyramid selling scheme.

Da Neo (Official Klutz and F***ing Shithead)
Music - None (Too pissed to turn on music)

Results Once Again

2005-06-02T10:23:00.000+08:00

The results are out. This is also the first time i am checking my results myself, for the past few semesters, they were all checked out by my friend. Another first would have been that the results were checked at a very seedy looking internet cafe in a dilapidated shopping mall in Langkawi. Win 98 and probably pentium 2 computers, antiques eh? Well, here's the breakdown of my results.

A
Introduction To Manufacturing Processes
Polymers & Composites

B
Electronic, Optical & Magnetic Properties Of Materials
Laboratory 2B
Working In The 21st Century
Economic Theory

C
Mechanics Of Materials
Characterisation Of Materials

Well that's all, 7 modules, ignoring Lab. These results are considered very average among the cohort, but am happy with it! :)

For those who know, i am keen on making an economics minor, by that i am supposed take an additional 5 more modules of Economics. Supposedly i have done 2 and have 3 more to go, which would equate to an additional module per semester up till the very last semester in NTU. However, i just read a stupid fine print today, which negated one of my economics module i have take so far, as it also constitutes part of my major in Materials Engineering, which means i have to take 4 more modules! This also means that for 1 semester, i have to overload 2 Economics modules on top my core subjects, which is considered manageable only under the standards of scholars. This leaves me in a major dilemma, should i carry on or not?

This sucks man. Comments if u guys or girls bother.

:(

Da Neo
Music - None

Holidays

2005-05-21T01:06:00.000+08:00

As usual, holidays are boring, but in a good way. A day's activities usually include waking up around 10 to 11 a.m, skipping breakfast, gaming, MTV, Lunch, more gaming, more MTV, dinner, silly taiwanese or hongkong TV serials, gaming(again) then finally sleep (usually a range, from 11p.m to 3 a.m).

Attempted to break out of the cycle by going for a swim in the wam afternoo sun, only to be greeted by a major thunderstorm right after i paid for my entry and was walking through the gantry to the public pools. Needless to say, i went home soaking wet but totally chlorine free and rather grumpy (wasted $2.60 in a failed attempt to get chlorinated hair, $1.60, to and fro bus trips to the pool and $1.00 on the entrance fees).

Today's a new day once again, am at the computer with MTV on Again and with nice wonderous weather AGAIN. Should i embark on another valiant trip to get chlorinated hair or just rot my day away again?

Well, the wonderous monotony of holidays, embrace it while we all can.

Da Neo
(Who went missing for so long from the blog, SORRY :P )

Music - Rob Thomas (Lonely no more on MTV)

Bad Day

2005-04-23T11:25:00.000+08:00

Horribly bad day, due to what else other than a freaking bad paper. Am screwed once again by own panic attack syndrome and poor exams tecniques. To summarise, i attempted approximately 3 out of 4 questions ONLY and am sure of he answers of slighty less than half. But the moment i step out of the examination hall, VIOLA! Miraculously, i manage to mentally solve them and rushing to a wooden bench, I DID, WITH EASE! The only difference is the venue and timng! AND THAT MATTERS! Who gives a damn if u can solve the questions out of the exmaination hall with no notes and no references. No One! NO ONE! And mind you, that includes myself too!

Also, what's up with the testing of MEMORISING and REGURGITATING OF INFORMATION? Engineers or any other professional careers usually allow you to refer to damn tables and charts for the DAMN EQUATIONS and CONSTANTS! Why the hell do we have to remember them?!?!! Ridiculously long equations (as a friend measured, 12 cm long in a 4 slide page handout, so u are not alone crybaby). Testing of understanding with constants and equations are fine but why the hell would i have to remember how heavy a damn electron weighs (An analogy)??? or the intrinsic concentration of silicon (today's damn exam)??? RIDICULOUS!

After so much i just realised i forgot to mention the paper is " MS 2008 (subject code) Magnetic and Optical Properties Of Materials" All materials engineers to be in NTU, BEWARE!

Off for more cursing and swearing to relive some of my bottled up stress form the recent bout of exam blues. Think i'll be fine, somehow, as its my 4th semester here anyway. What The HELL RIGHT?!?!?

F*** IT!

Da Neo
(Off To Rewatch The Incredibles For the Upteenth Time)
Music : Twins - 老鼠爱大米 (国语版)

Home.....

2005-04-13T23:36:00.000+08:00

Got a few hours (to be precise, is 5 hours) to my first paper of a total of seven papers that i am taking this semester. I really don't know what i am doing here. AM SUPPOSED to be mugging. SIGH......

Well, this very first battle is my GEM or GE (General Elective) module, Intermediate Economic Theory. Am taking a total of 8 modules with 7 of them being examinable and this will bring me all the way to 4th of May. Well, here's wishing myself and all of you muggers out there, best of luck, best of health and never ending stamina for mugging.

___________________________________________________________

Well, other than that, i DEMAND all of you to listen to Michael Bublé's "Home". (Thanks K for his album :P) Its aching good. Let your ears be the judge, don't just believe me. Below are the lyrics to the song.

Home (Michael Bublé)

Another summer day
Is come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
But this was not your dream
But you always believe in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
And even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home
__________________________________________________________

I really feel like going home!!!!! (No pun intended here!) Never missed it so damn much. hahahaha. Silly me, its only been slighty more than a month and about another month or so to go. Well, perhaps i have never grown up, or perhaps its the exams or perhaps its the songs, perhaps.......

Da Neo
(Reasonably healthy, but extremely pimply)
Music : Michael Bublé - Home (2005)

Eeeeeee for Economics .....

2005-04-05T18:52:00.000+08:00

Am finally through my 1st readings for the entire Economics module. This took way longer than what i expected and way longer than i have planned. This could also be attributed to the fact of laziness and my very prone to disturbances nature.

Also, this module of Economics is only a GE or GEM module, otherwise known as general elective (which may constitute to part of an economics minor if i do carry on with it). HOWEVER, it does nothing for my major in materials engineering or my honours for the course.

Despite feeling a small sense of accomplishment in finally completing my 1st readings, am feel rather silly and lost at the same time, as i SHOULD have spent all those time on my core subjects as they would give me a better major (assuming that spending more time = doing better). An analogy to this would be conflicting interests when implementing the contractionary fiscal policy by cutting government expenditure (wanting to minimise budget deficit at the same time reduce unemployment).

MAN! that sounded a little crazy and probably wrong. For those, who are majoring in economics or know better or more than i do, feel free to correct my statement. hahahahaha.

Its official too that i am a sick(for laughing at my mindless and un-funny attempted jokes), fat (from snacking way too much while mugging) nerd for the time being with terrible hair (should have had a haircut long ago).

Will attempt to not think and worry about the impending exams in 8 days time and reward myself with a 5 hour sleep (oops 4.5 hours now, used 0.5 hour on this incoherent entry hahaha), before waking up to enjoy reading through my notes on "Electronic, Magnetic and Optical Properties Of Materials" (Ohhhhh, how interesting sounding!) in preparation for the short quizz in 2 days time (Why the hell are there still quizzes or tests when there are only around 1 week's time to the finals??????)

Till next entry.

Da Neo

Music : Enya - Exile (Watermark 1988)

L for .....

2005-04-02T21:04:00.000+08:00

L for LANGKAWI!

Lang lang lang.

Lang KAWI!

LANGKAWI.

heh heh. silly entry, but felt the need for a shout out.

Thanks K!

: )

Da Neo
(Desperately trying to mug to no avail)

Encounter Of The 4th Kind

2005-03-30T14:49:00.000+08:00

Acquaintances, “friends” from the past whom you are no longer friends with now and acquaintances from the past, in order of decreasing closeness are probably people you either choose to or unknowningly forget. They are also people whom you either don’t meet up with or hope that you won’t be stuck in awkward situations with, e.g the lift or worse, the TOILET!!!! In the rest of this entry, they will regarded as people of the 4th kind.

When one is relieving himself or herself in the toilet, one would most probably at his/her most defenseless and vulnerable state and would definitely be not ready an out of the blue encounter of the 4th kind. Well, I was at one of the urinals today, doing what I should be doing and minding my own business, then “POOF” a very magnificent specimen of the 4th kind took a urinal right next to me. He probably had little choice too as all other cubicles and urinals were also occupied. Initially, I did not notice him as he was from way back, all I have of him in my memory is a face with no name attached to it.

Then, his voice suddenly boomed “Hey!”.

(Mind furiously matching names to faces, but failing terribly)
Me : Oh…. Hello!!!!! (Weakly smiling with no attempt to engage a handshake)

4th kind : How are you? So long never see you?

Me : Oh…. I’m fine. (Mentally and physically trying to expedite whatever I was doing)

Me : Ermm how about you? (Desperately wanting to finish up and go)

4th kind : Good… good. The usual...
(Eyes momentarily meeting with mine then goes back to looking into his urinal, seemingly concentrating on his business)

Me : Erm i’ll be going first. Have lessons. See ya around.
(Furiously zipping up and brisk walking to the sink and washing hands at a lighting speed)

4th kind : OK! Bye Bye! (Head turns and tilts towards me from his staring into his own urinal)

------ End Of (EUUE) Extremely Uncomfortable Urinal Encounter ------

Well, I’m sure all of us have had our fair share of encounters with the 4th kind be it in the toilets or in the lifts. At least for me, they never fail to make me extremely uncomfortable or in Chinese, (Bu4 Zi4 Zai4).

Just wondering how should I better learn to react to these scenarios hmmm……..
Comments? Hahahaha.

Da Neo
(Coughsy and less Flusy)

NB: After 5 hours, I finally recalled his name as “Ricky”. Hahaha. Here hoping he never ever reads this. :P

OhOh CoCo

2005-03-26T06:41:00.000+08:00

CoCo Lee's got a new full length studio album in english entitled "Exposed" and she means that literally. Click on link below to find out why. Sorry i don't know how to add images here yet.

http://www.sonymusic.com.tw/pop/coco/p6.php

R&B seems to be the new direction she is trying to venture in, after the not very successful conventional ballady approach of her 1st full length studio album in english (Just No Other Way). Although i liked that album pretty much, it did not seem to do much for her foray into the International Music Scene, despite OK sales in Asia, she was probably still rather unheard off anywhere else. In this album, she's adapted a new way of singing (initially i could not recognise her voice) . More moany, airy, floaty, smooth R&B-ish. (Don't think along the line of Mariah Carey and her Glitter album, NOT THAT moany!)

SEX SELLS!

We all know that and man, CoCo is utisiling that to the max. Some sample lyrics:

Track 5: So Good, Chorus "I feel your flow/ The vibe is so sexual/ Got me feeling like letting go/ Think i'm gonna ride you all night long/ 'Cause this feels so, so, so, good. (moan)/ So,so,so,good. (moan)

Track 7: Rock It : Chorus "Do you wanna rock it baby/ i wanna roll with you for sure/ i don't wanna stop this baby/ do what you want with me"

The sexy theme is further emphasised in the photos in the album sleeve cover and lyrics, which all seem to scream "Asian Temptress!!!!". Some are really rather poorly taken as in they seem to say more "hi i'm a prostitute" rather than "hi i'm an Asian pop star, hear me sing..." How sterotypical and how predictable. Oh CoCo aren't you seeming a little desperate to sell your cd?

Muscially wise, the effort is rather commendable. What should be there, is there, especially for a 1st R&B release. Also, every song is co-wrote by CoCo herself, though i would hope she could showcase more diversity by getting guest and well known songwriters to help make the album more palatable to the American audience. Another notable effort in making this album is that most of the additional background vocals are all done by herself (except those male voices rapping..... stating the obvious here. hahaha)

Lastly, Oh CoCo, dressing up is not shameful. Sexy not equals trampy. And beware of slipping into Mariah's moany doggy freaking style in Glitter, or Utada's senseless lyrics; another Asian pop star who recently made an effort to capture the American industry by doing also an R&B release cowrote all the lyrics, but terribly meaningless. Some sample lyrics, "You're Easy breezy and im japanesy/ soon you'll mean nothing to me/ does that mean anything to you?" All i can say is NO! i does not mean anything to me!!!!

Oh CoCo, here's wishing you success. Hopefully you will finally be able to have a successful breakthrough album. And all you skeptics out there, give this album a spin, you may be surprised.

Da Neo
(Horribly Flusy)
(% of Lab Report done = 1)

God Of Gluttony

2005-03-24T09:33:00.000+08:00

Its official.

The damn God Of Gluttony visited me today and his stuck with me, at least for the time being. Am munching everything that looks like food within reach from my bed in my little cozy and rather messy room.

Current counter of food consumed in the past 1 hour or so:

1) Chicken in a Biscuits (0.5 box, 100g, 28,4g fast, 2191KJ energy)

2) 5 pckts of some chewy gummy bear sweets (unknown amount of sugars and fats, probably damn high, tat's y its called sweets u see!)

3) 2 packets of Marigold Lemon Tea Drink (29.5 g carbohydrates, 26.3 g sugar) (stats are for each pack)

4) Approx 100g or slightly more of preserved guava (0.2g fats, 78g carbohydrates, 319.4 calories)

5) Lakerol Sweets almost half a pack now (Once again a form of candy, i ate 14g of it)

Level of satisfaction: Constantly decreasing with the amount eaten (i.e getting hungrier as i eat more)

Wasitline : Inifinity (With blubber vibrating with every movement of me body) EWWWW!

Chest : Thankfully still have not morphed into saggy breasts yet, but at this rate, they may!

Plea to God Of Gluttony:

Dear God,

Lemme go! Lemme Go! Lemme GO! LEMME GO! I don't want to die at 25 with cholestrol and fats spilling out from my nostrils, heart and brains! LEMME GO! (Furiously munching on more Chicken In a Biscuits as i type this)

Thank you and regards.

Belovedly mortal,

Da Neo
(Flusy and coughsy still)

8 Dollar Drama

2005-03-22T17:55:00.000+08:00

With my recent bout of mental depression, my physical well being suffered a major battering too. Am now officially very sick with flu, sore throat, cough and fever, or basically, the whole damn package of the common cold.

Went to visit the school doc in the morning. Was one of the 1st few patients of the day (17th i think). Other than getting the usual, rest more and drink more water from the doctor, i recieved some rather "revealing" and "shocking" knowledge from the dcotor too. Below is an attempted re-enactment of the conversation.

Doc : You mentioned that there is also the problem of wheezing, have u ever been on an inhaler?

Me : No.

Doc : Huh? Why? Do you know how to use an inhaler? (Flips through medical record)

Me : No.

Doc : (Ponders for a sec and Frowns) So u have been taking neulin or ventolin tablets (for wheezing and asthma) all these years? This is very strange. Inhalers are considered more effective, less dangerous and less side effects.

Me : (Shocked) Erm.... yes..... (Trying to appear less shocked) Perhaps course i don't take this very often or...... (wanders off, deep in thought)

Doc : (Ponders really hard, frowns and wrinkles her face) Hmmmm........... ok. i'll give you the tablets. BUT take them only at night when you are about to sleep and use sparingly unless u feel the wheezing coming on.

Me : Oh ok. Thank you.

End of Conversation.

The issue here is, i have been taking the tablets for almost ALL MY LIFE now. Particularly so in my younger years as i perpetually had the problem of wheezing and mild asthma. SIDE EFFECTS? i don't even know what to expect now. Oh my oh my.....

Well, this trip to the doc of 8 dollars definitely enlightened me on the pills i USED TO take rather frequently to supress my wheezing. As for the flu package, hope this 8 dollars will be enough to cure it.

Current cost of flu : $8 (doc), $2 (tissue papers), $ Inifinity (Social costs of irritating friends and lecture mates by blowing my nose oh so frequently)

Da Neo
Sick and blue (minor improvement from being grey)

Mentally SICK

2005-03-14T23:37:00.000+08:00

Feeling terrible today.

Here are some adjectives that i attempt to use to describe my feelings

1) Lonely
2) Sickened of everything and anything
3) Drained (More mentally than physically)
4) Stupid (Dunno y)
5) Helpless

Well that's all for now. i can't even compose this blog entry properly. Its definitely not coherent at all. Can't think, can't focus, can't do shit. Even chinese orchestra practice seems so..... rubishy. And anyone who attempts to talk to me seems like noise.

I probably am going crazy or depressed.

Hate being so helpless. Don't know why i feel like that. No reasons no nothing. It just "popped" up out of the blue or grey (colour of everything now).

Da Neo

Dilemma.

2005-03-14T08:34:00.000+08:00

Been in a fix nowadays.

For the past week or so, many of the committee members have been asking around who would want to stay as a comm member for the next academic year. This is definitely a rather early question to ask, as our term officially ends only august 2005. That is like four months away. Nonetheless, it left me in a dilemma. Being in the comm has its perks, like being able to pick up management skills and making more friends. However, it has proven to be extermely time consuming and school work compromising. Hence, i am hesitating.

Another reason for me thinking soooo hard over this seemingly silly question is the problem of residing in halls of residences. It is rather competitive here and i would definitely need more CCA points from participating in such activities. Thus the benefits of participating in the comm would indirectly ensure me a place in hall.

However, things are seldom so simple in life. Or at least in MY life. Next year would be my 3rd year in NTU. It is also the year where i have to go my for industrial attachment. I have been hoping that i could get an attachment overseas, meaning i would be spending 1 smester overseas. I have been really looking forward to this. However if i do go, it would also mean i cannot participate in any extra curricular activities be it comm or not comm and will be at the mercy of the merciless hall people to allocate me a room, or worse, don't allocate me room at all. The thought of having to spending 3 to 4 hours of travelling time a day in my final year, just seems like madness to me.

It should be pretty obvious what my dilemma is now, overseas IA (for a chance of a lifetime experience) or a sure place in hall and loads of fun in the future Chinese Orchestra committee.

Should be studying for coming finals (in less than a month) but i am not.

Perturbed and restless.

As always,

Da Neo

Holy Grail

2005-03-05T12:22:00.000+08:00

The search for Da Holy Grail has finally been acoomplished.

Its White, 60GB.

hee hee.

haha!

hoho....

Da Neo

WOOOO!!!!

2005-02-27T21:07:00.000+08:00

Its over!

The NTUCO annual concert was a major success!

We hit ticket sales of 75%.

Steady POM PEE PEE!

wahahahahaha.

Thanks to all who came and watch despite the fact that you may hate chinese music to begin with. I really appreciate everyone's support.

Now ill have more time for all my friends and school work! wooo hoo!

Da Neo

La la la ...

2005-01-24T09:10:00.000+08:00

Feeling exceptionally chirpy at the same time sickly today. Man it sucks to have a flu when the weather is so hot. Imagine u are sneezing and your nose and eyes are all watery, while u are sweating like hell. ARGH!

Still, my chripy mood cannot be dampened by this sucky feeling of flu in summer. Well, the Chinese Orchestra performance yesterday (Hsinghai Cultural Centre performance) at the Singapore Conference Hall, was reasonably good. With few and almost non-obvious mistakes along the way! :) Although i can't help but marvel at the high level of "smoking" skills of some members (including me at times hahahaha... ), who managed to fake their way through most of the pieces. One could literally see a cloud of white mist hovering on their heads. hahahaha. Wonder what fun they dervive from that. At least i played more than 95% (only) of the whole thing, except for some ridiculously crazy bits where one's fingers are expected to be more flexible than a seasoned contortionist to be able to play them.

Another reason to be chirpy was the excellent support from my friends and NTUCO (Nanyang Technological University Chinese Orchestra). Although some of them were there to support someone else. but, what the heck! THANK YOU ALL! HUGZ!!!!!!

Am now looking forward to the next concert on 26th FEB at Sinagpore Conference Hall put up by NTUCO! All of you reading this must support! (Unless you are performing!) Hope our ticket sales will beat Hsinghai hands down and make it NTUCO's only concert so far where we don't make a loss! wahahahahahaha!

Last reason i am so chirpy, was, DURIANS!!!!!!!!!!! wahahahaha! How i miss your spiny, prickly, pungent and sticky self! wahahahahahaha! THANK YOU PAPA!!!!!! Its really been a while manx! Like 3 months? Since i last touched it. Pity i was rather sick last night and had only a bit, but still, its the thought and the smell that counts wahahahaha!

DURIANS RULE!!!!!!!

Da Neo

Fluzy, Sore Throatsy, Slightly Feverish
Hot and cold at the same time
BUT
DAMN Chirpy!

Lalala...... ahhhhhh choooo~~~~~

:)

The Walk

2005-01-17T01:56:00.000+08:00

With regards to the previous entry, well, i admit i did in fact over-burden myself with too much stuff, on top of the so many modules i am taking this semester. With all the bottled up stress, and forcasted stress, i had to do something for myself, to ease this horrendous feeling.

Last thursday, after 9 hours of lessons which ended at 830 p.m, i took a walk. A stroll in fact. From Canteen A to Canteen 3 then back to Hall 5 (About 0.5 the circumference of NTU). Fortunately for me, the weather was kind to me and i was wearing proper shoes. heh heh. Well, this gloriously long stroll did wonders for an exceptionally lazy person like me. During the walk, with nice music in my ears (Thank You Qingying, if u ever read this), i started to break down all the crap i had to do and metally sort them out in the order of priority and the chronological order of events. Well, that took only 15 minutes, the other 15 to 20 minutes, was self-hypnotism, self-motivation or meditation (dunno which is the correct term, hence i gave 3, heh heh.) I blocked out all thoughts from my over-used brain and began counting the beats in the song, then i started walking to pace the beats (or half the speed of the beats if it was a fast song), then gradually, i was enjoying myself, just walking. Miraculously, when i reached my hall, i was feeling rather re-energised (instead of lethargic) and wanted to keep walking, but a totally unimportant phonecall (asking me to consolidate attendance and performance list of my members by the following monday) broke the mood and rhythm of the walk and i dragged myself up the stairs to my hall/dorm.

What i gained from this out of nowhere walk, was a few precious minutes of peace and total relaxation. Will look forward to the next time i do this.

Happy walking people. It worked for me, somehow, so try it!

Da Neo

To Quit Or To Stay?

2005-01-14T00:27:00.000+08:00

Over the past few weeks, my responsibilities in Chinese Orchestra have been steadily increasing with no sign of any levelling off or slowing down any time soon, due to the 2 major performances coming up really soon. Then an email i recieved today just rocked my boat even harder, threatening to throw my life out of balance.

A short summary of the email " We will be having a meeting......... Visual Arts Festival........ Sub Commers meeting...... Compulsory meeting....... these are the stuff you are in charge of.......

It is only then i realised "OH i joined another committee's sub committee too? ( i am already in the main commitee for NTU chinese orchestra and a temporary performing member for Hsing Hai Chinese Orchestra) WOW! Why the hell did i put myself in such a mess? " Now what is very apparent is that there would be definitely be event and commitment clashes.

Common sense tells me that the main commitee commitments and my studies hold the highest importance, hence the feeling of quitting the Visual Arts Society Committee popped up. However, i was introduced to the committee by a friend (auheim), the chair is a long time friend (sw) and the in charge is a rather nice person. By quitting i believe i may incur the wrath of all, at the same time, it would look horrendous on my personality and character.

Sigh....... To quit? or to stay?

Perturbed.

Da Neo

New Year New Challenges

2005-01-03T17:36:00.000+08:00

2005 arrived with no bang whatsoever, due to the gloomy end (both literal and metaphorical) to 2004. My heart goes out to all those who have lost a friend or family in the tsunami disaster. Let's all pray for a better 2005, especially for WORLD PEACE. Also, let's all hope for a nice sunny day real soon, as am currently very sick of the weather. (Been raining almost non-stop for the past few days).

The new school term will officially begin tomorrow. Am taking 8 modules and a total of 22 academic units. (a very heavy load, regardless how u choose to see it) Hope i will survive reasonably well.

Bought a new external TDK CD/RW-DVD combo drive today with the cash grant (ERS) from our beloved government. Will officially test it tomorrow when i am back in my dorm / hall.

I have 2 Chinese Orchestra concerts (where i will be performing) coming up in the next 2 months, namely on 23 Jan (Tics at $8, $10 and $12 i think) and on 26 Feb (Tics at $10). The performance on the earlier date is with an external orchestra where i am helping out. One can be assured of high standards as the players there are all voluntary and exteremely experienced. The later performance is staged by NTUCO (Nanyang Technological University Chinese Orchestra), the standards of this orchestra are not as high as the previous orchestra, however, we're trying very hard, and pieces played are definitely challenging and probably quite familiar to many, so please support us. Anyone who is interested in any one or BOTH, sms or call me, u guys/gals know the number. :)

Sigh.... my english standards have plunged quite a bit, as one could clearly see from the very disjointed entry today. or maybe i am just tired.

Till next time.....

Da Neo